Rude Awakenings: Refresh
by BriaSnape
Summary: Severitus/Sevitus. It is the summer before Harry's 6th year and things are about to change in a big way. Severus is Harry's father. How will the pair deal with the changes and challenges ahead? After all, Severus and Harry hate each other, right? Why should a little shared blood change that?
1. Letters from Everyone

Hello and welcome to Rude Awakenings! This is a story I started writing a while ago and now, being a little older and I would like to think wiser, I have decided to go back and rewrite. I think my writing style really evens out in chapter 4, I hope you stick with me. So, without further ado, please enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and Co.

Chapter 1: Letters from Everyone

Harry woke again from another one of his nightmares. He'd been having the same reoccurring nightmare for the past month, ever since he returned to Number 4 Privet Drive and to his dreaded relatives the Dursley's.

Harry could not shake the images of Sirius falling through the veil, of Cedric's death in the graveyard, of Voldemort rising out of the cauldron and seeing his parents ghostly forms. He had stopped seeing the Department of Mysteries and was now seeing much worse.

He felt sick, his sleep had been fitful at best since the end of last school term. One good thing about Moody's threat to the Dursley's, he had access to his trunk with all his school things. He had all of his homework done already trying to get his mind off of Sirius' death, but when the homework ran out, he found himself thinking how stupid he had been. If only he would have remembered the mirror Sirius had given him before leaving Grimmauld place last year, or remembered that Professor Snape was a member of the Order of the Phoenix, he may still have the man that was as close to a father to him as he had ever known.

The Dursley's hadn't really spoken to Harry at all other than to tell him what chores to do or yell at him for one odd thing or another. He actually didn't mind the chores and did a better job than ever before. After all, anything to distract him from the pain of losing Sirus was worth doing.

He looked over at Hedwig's cage he had let her out last night and she still wasn't back. He hoped she was okay. He was not overly concerned as Hedwig always did seem to be a bit brighter and more observant than some of the other owls.

Harry began thinking once again about what he could have done differently, already knowing what he could have done, not been such a dunderhead and quick to play the hero, as Hermione had told him, he liked to play.

He checked his clock it was five in the morning. Harry remembered when sleep used to be a place of bliss for him, when dreams would take him away from his life with the Dursley's. Now Harry went about his day in a sort-of half daze.

It was Harry's sixteenth birthday. He expected to get letters from his friends but he wasn't all to looking forward to it. He knew what they would say. He could see them now.

"You mustn't blame yourself Harry."

"No one blames you."

He greatly appreciated them and knew how lucky he was to have such great friends, but he didn't want to hear more about Sirius' death on his Birthday. It was a Birthday after all, meant for celebrating birth, not to think about the day someone else had died. Not that his birthday had ever mattered before, why should it now? And really, he didn't deserve to be celebrating his life when his godfather was gone due to him.

He heard a familiar tapping on his window and as predicted there was the forecast of owls. Six tawny owls along with one snowy white owl, Hedwig, Harry's owl. He trudged over to the window and opened it to let them all in.

They all flew in and landed on Harry's bed. He relieved Hedwig of her burden first. It was from Hermione.

 _Dear Harry,_

 _Happy Birthday! So how are you doing? It must be really hard for you. How are the Dursley's treating you? I hope they haven't been too harsh on you. If they are, remember, don't send mail for three days or send something to a member of the Order and tell them to come get you. We're here for you, Harry._

 _How are you doing on your homework? I've nearly completed all of mine._

 _Don't forget to keep in touch with your friends we all care about you so much. You mustn't blame yourself for what happened, Sirius died how he would have wanted to, protecting you._

Harry couldn't help but scoff a little here, he couldn't help but think he shouldn't be dead at all...

 _I hope you will find my gift useful. I think it will come in handy, especially now that the Ministry has acknowledged Voldemort's return._

 _Again Happy Birthday!_

 _Love From,_

 _Hermione_

It was of course a book. It was called "The Never Ending Spell Book". There was a small note in the inside cover of the book, it dropped out as Harry flipped through the pages. He picked it up.

 _This book has many spells and adds new ones as they are registered with the Ministry. When we get back to school we can practice them together. Stay safe Harry!_

Harry thought it probably was a good idea to learn some new spells. He needed to prepare, more than ever he wanted to rid the world of Voldemort.

He turned to the next owl and relieved it of its burden, as soon as he untied the parcel and the letter the owl took flight out the window.

This one was from Hagrid.

 ** _Dear Harry,_**

 ** _Happy Birthday! Only one more year until you become of age. Then you can have a little fun with those ruddy Dursley's. Just know that if you ever need to talk I'm here. I hope the Dursley's aren't starving you none. Either way I made you this. Olympe is helping me to improve my cooking. I made this meself, I never knew my cooking was bad._**

 ** _You all always seemed to like it._**

 ** _Hagrid_**

Harry opened the box from Hagrid. It was a package of rock cakes and it looked like Hagrid's cooking had improved. He picked one up and was amazed when he could actually break it in half. Harry and Ron had sometimes used the rock cakes for target practice after visiting Hagrid, he'd actually be able to eat them now. He smiled faintly at the memory and then set the cakes aside. He hadn't been eating much. The Dursley's would yell at him for eating too much no matter how little he ate, it didn't matter, he didn't have a desire for food anyway.

He moved on to the next owl. This owl left also when its load was untied. It was from Fred and George.

 _Hey Harry,_

 _Since you funded us we decided to send you some free samples. Make sure to try some on Dudley, that pig cousin of yours. Hope you're doing all right. Obviously we have heard about what happened in the Department of Mysteries and we send along our condolences._

 _Business is booming at our shop. Feel free to stop by sometime and see us. Maybe you can sign photographs for us. Only joking, of course._

 _Fred and_ _ _George__

He unwrapped the twins' gift; there were a lot of different colored candies and other strange objects. Harry would have smiled but it brought back memories of the Triwizard Cup. Thinking about the winnings he gave the twins, he also remembered Cedric.

Harry quickly banished the image from his mind and moved onto the next gift that was from Ginny.

 _Dear Harry,_

 _A very happy birthday to you! I'm sure you don't want to be reminded of what happened, but remember, I dealt with Tom in my first year and while I know that I can't possibly understand how you feel completely, I do to a certain degree. I found this at Grimmauld Place, I'm not sure how it got there, but I recall seeing you with it once before and thought you may like it back. It looks like a regular mirror but I thought it might mean something to you._

 _I hope to see you soon._

 _With Love,_

 _Ginny_

Harry opened the package that was wrapped in brown paper. It was the other mirror. The one that would have kept Sirius alive if Harry wouldn't have had such a one tracked mind at the time. He held it tight to his chest though. It did mean a lot to him.

He carefully set the mirror down on his nightstand and took another load off an owl's leg. It was by far the largest package of them all. Once Harry removed it from the owl it fluttered over to Hedwig's cage and wearily drank from her water dish. Hedwig watched with disgust at the owl. That was _her_ water dish.

He opened the letter.

 _Harry,_

 _This is a gift from Professors Dumbledore, McGonagall, myself and, by association, Professor Snape. Although, I'm afraid I must admit he is none too pleased by it._

 _I suspect your dreams have not been too pleasant as of late. This should help you sleep. If you ever need help or need to be rescued from the Dursley's just send word. No one blames you Harry. Professor Snape was reluctant to sign this but we convinced him in the end._

 _Sincerely,_

 _Remus Lupin, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall, and a not so sincere Severus Snape_

 _P.S: Sorry Harry, Severus insisted on signing that way if he were to sign at all. He really does send his care. -Lupin_

 _No, I do not Lupin and do no think that you have anything but my deepest disdain and the only thing you have ever given me Potter is a headache from wasting my time and energy on you! - Snape_

 _Do not worry of course he does Harry, not that you would really care, for I see that you both play an act of dislike. Oh, and your Firebolt is stored safely at the school and will be returned to you upon your arrival. - Albus Dumbledore_

An 'act of dislike,' Harry couldn't help but roll his eyes, what was Dumbledore on about now? Harry couldn't stand the potions professor and it was quite obvious Snape reciprocated those feelings.

Harry opened the package to find four phials of Dreamless Sleep potion with a small note from Remus on dosage and usage. He couldn't help but to open one and sniff it, he wouldn't put it past the potions professor to slip a little something extra into his potions. Everything checked out to Harry, as he held it up to the light and it was the same shimmery purple color he had remembered taking in the infirmary after Voldemort's return. He sighed in relief, this would certainly come in handy.

He turned to the next small owl; it was Pigwidgeon, Ron's owl.

 _Hey Harry,_

 _Happy Birthday, mate! Sorry about what happened. How are the muggles treating you? I know what I got you isn't much but money is a bit tight right now. Well, when isn't it around here really?_

 _Hermione owled me about my homework. Can you believe she's almost finished? What am I saying? Of course she's almost finished I'm actually surprised she's not done already. Don't tell her, but I haven't even started mine yet. If she finds out, I'm sure I would get at least three feet of parchment from her lecturing me about 'responsibility' and how it's 'for your own good', blah, blah, blah. Actually, I don't think I would put it past her to send me a howler, then think what my mum would do when she found out! I don't think I could handle that, if I don't show up for start of term you know why now. Well, I suppose I could start on my Charms homework._

 _See you when term resumes!_

 _Ron Weasley_

 _P.S. I asked mum if you could come and stay with us, but she said due to the 'climate' of the wizarding world you are safest with your relatives. Only five more weeks though. Sorry mate!_

Harry opened Ron's gift, a big pack of chocolate frogs. He set them aside and turned to the last owl. It carried his Hogwarts letter as he went to remove the package from the owl, he got a peck on his hands for his trouble. Clearly it wasn't happy he was made to wait while Harry opened the other packages. He muttered a 'sorry' to the bird as it flew into the morning air, but really as a Hogwarts owl, shouldn't he be more professional than that? Harry shrugged and looked at the clock on his night stand.

It was now half past six. It was time to get around for the day, after getting dressed in his hand-me-downs, he made his way quietly to the bathroom, brushed his teeth and wet his hair to comb it, not even bothering to look in the mirror. He would just be disappointed anyway, it would never lie fat. He then headed downstairs to cook breakfast for the Dursley's, whom were usually downstairs by seven. Well, his Aunt and Uncle anyway, Dudley still relied on Aunt Petunia to wake him every morning. 'Lazy pig.' Harry thought to himself as he stepped over the squeaky step on the staircase, no need to have the Dursley's downstairs any sooner than they need be.

He pulled out a frying pan and uncovered the toaster. He concentrated wholeheartedly on the breakfast so as not to think about Sirius. Within twenty minutes he had cooked up a full English breakfast complete with freshly squeezed orange juice made with a juicer.

At exactly seven o'clock Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon, followed by a half awake Dudley still in his pajamas, entered the kitchen, completely ignoring Harry as he set everything on the table and then sat down himself. The Dursley's all ate greedily. The smell of the bacon and sausage waking Dudley up, he began stuffing his big porky face with everything that was within arms reach.

"Boy!' Uncle Vernon rasped at Harry just as he was making a reach for a piece of toast, about the only thing he could stomach in the mornings, he quickly pulled his hand back. 'Aunt Marge will be visiting for a few days tomorrow and if you have another slip up like last time, I'm warning you, you'll regret it?" Uncle Vernon glared over the top of the morning paper with his beady eyes.

"Yes sir." Harry responded obediently.

"And as far as she's concerned you still attend _St_. _Brutus_ ' Secure _Center_ for Incurably Criminal Boys."

"Yes sir." Harry replied with a monotonous tone.

"There is a list of chores for you to do in the living room. Eat your toast and then get to work."

"Yes sir." Harry replied one last time. He loathed Aunt Marge. Her visits never brought anything good, but Harry didn't have the strength to care at the moment. The way he saw it what will come, will come one way or the other.

"We are going out for a while, we will return at seven o'clock and you best have dinner on the table. You are not to leave the house while we are gone." Uncle Vernon stated. Harry just nodded as the Dursley's stood up and left. Where would he go anyway?

He began to clean up without wasting any time. He took his time cleaning the dishes then headed to the living room for his list of mind distractions. He saw it on the coffee table.

Chores

1\. Dust all rooms

2\. Clean all windows

3\. Sweep kitchen

4\. Vacuum all carpeting

5\. Trim the hedges and mow the lawn

6\. Clean bathrooms

7\. Move all of your stuff to the cupboard under the stairs. Marge will be sleeping in your room. You will sleep on the floor in the cupboard.

"Well, no time like the present." Harry muttered sarcastically to himself. Aunt Marge's usual guest room had long since been taken over as Dudley's second bedroom. Without Harry's room to fill up with all of his broken toys, computer games and unread books, the second guest room was quickly filled. The furniture however, had been saved and Harry knew he would have to move that in there too.

Harry gathered the cleaning supplies from the utility closet in the kitchen and began with cleaning all of the windows in the Dursley's already spotless house. He figured that a normal person probably wouldn't be able to tell the difference if he had cleaned the already spotless windows or not but Aunt Petunia would be able to find something wrong with them regardless.

XxXxXxXx

Minutes before the Dursley's were supposed to arrive home that evening, Harry placed a pot roast compete with potatoes, carrots and onions, still in the slow cooker on the table. The Dursley's were often home later than they said they would be and Harry did not want to be on the receiving end of his Uncle's wrath if the food was cold. Harry then retired to his 'room', now cupboard, not feeling hungry and knowing in no way his presence would be missed from the table. In fact, they would be glad to not see him.

He clicked on the light in his cupboard and shut the door behind him. Crouched down he looked around him and wondered how he had lived the first eleven years of his life in here, it was so tiny. Of course, it seemed that much smaller to him now that he was sixteen.

As he made to sit on his makeshift bed for the next few days he spotted the thick Hogwarts envelope he had not had time to open earlier. He picked it up, and getting as comfortable as he could on the blankets on the floor, slid his finger underneath the envelope's flap and pulled out the parchment inside.

Inside were three pieces of parchment. His Hogwarts reminder that term started on the first of September, his book list, and his O.W.L results- he had completely forgotten about. Ignoring the book list and term reminder he quickly unfolded the O.W.L results and read.

 _Harry James Potter has received:_

 _Astronomy: Acceptable_

No surprise there, that had been the night that they tried to take Hagrid and stunned Professor McGonagall, everyone had been distracted.

 _Care of Magical Creatures: Exceeds Expectations  
Charms: Exceeds Expectations  
Defense Against the Dark Arts: Outstanding  
Divination: Poor  
Herbology: Exceeds Expectations_

 _Transfiguration: Exceeds Expectations  
History of Magic: Dreadful_

Again, no surprise, he had fallen asleep during that exam.

The last grade was what surprised him the most and it was a good thing he was sitting down or he may have just fallen over with the shock.

 _Potions: Outstanding_

He stared at it for a moment, not believing what he saw. How was that possible? And even if it was possible, would Snape really let him into his Advanced Potions class? Would it be enough? He wouldn't be at all surprised if Snape contested his admissions to the Advanced Potions class anyway. All he could figure is it was probably because he didn't have Snape breathing down his neck during the exam. He had certainly felt he had done well, but not that well.

 _Total O.W.L.s earned 7/9_

He had met all of the requirements to become an Auror, he could pursue his career choice now. If he lived that long that is. Harry shook his head, these morbid thoughts were getting old. He _would_ become an Auror, he had to have something to live for after all.

Harry lay down on the floor and stared up at the ceiling, there was still a drawing on the ceiling he remembered doing with broken crayons he had been able to pilfer from the trash after Dudley had broken them in half with his meaty fists. He had drawn himself with a real family, a family that loved him. He drew himself in the middle and was holding the hand of a female with brilliant red hair blowing in the wind from the trees drawn nearby. Attached to his other stick finger hand was a man with long black hair. Hmm, odd, he thought to himself, I don't remember why I did that...He turned to his side, giving little thought to it. After all, he had only been five when he drew it.

As he reached for his Potions text he heard the latch to the front door click and the heavy steps of his relatives cross through into the entryway. He listened as they made their way to the kitchen and pulled the chairs out to sit down to dinner. It would come as no surprise to him if something was found wrong with the food. He didn't understand how his 'family' could have such short tempers. Sure, Harry got short-tempered but they would too if they had a murderous, rampaging lunatic trying to kill them every year.

He heard the clink of silverware as the Dursley's began to scoop food onto their plates greedily. Harry listened intently.

"It's cold." Uncle Vernon barked. "Boy! Get out here."

Harry lay his text on the ground next to his blankets, quickly marking his page and making his way out of the cupboard, it was best to not keep his Uncle waiting.

"And what do you have to say for yourself?" Vernon pointed a fork at Harry, with bits of potato flying onto the floor as he did so.

"I don't understand, sir. I left the slow cook..." He looked at the pot on the table, the light was not on, quickly realizing his mistake he looked down at the ground. How could he have been so stupid! He had forgot to plug the pot in after moving it to the dining room table from the kitchen counter.

Vernon raised an eyebrow in glee, with a satisfied smirk on his face he made to grab the boy by his ear. Harry quickly dodged and made his way over against the wall on the opposite end of the room.

"You were late, had you been here on time it wouldn't have been." Harry said struggling to keep his temper down. He knew better, why couldn't he just keep his mouth shut? He was angry with himself after all.

"Don't you talk to me like that. You best keep a civil tongue when Marge arrives and dinner best not be cold either." Vernon snarled standing with great effort.

"If she isn't late the food won't be cold and I will keep a civil tongue as long as she does. I haven't written to anyone in two days. One more and they'll show up on the doorstep when Aunt Marge is here and I know you don't want that." Harry snarled back.

"Are you threatening me boy?" Vernon glared at him looking ready to strike.

Harry hesitated for a moment surveying Vernon's expression, he should just shut his mouth now, apologize again, offer to heat up the roast and make his way safely back to the relative comfort of his cupboard, but somehow he couldn't.

"No, simply stating the facts. You know laying it all on the table, out in the open, so we're clear." Harry answered forcing himself to stay calm, as calm as he could be anyway, he couldn't say that he wasn't a little nervous.

Vernon stared him down with his beady little eyes.

"Get over here, boy. Now!" he barked. Harry considered staying exactly where he was, or dodging around his Uncle and heading for the front door. At the look on his Uncle's face he decided against it. Better to get this over with, besides, even if he did make it out the front door, he would just be forced back by Dumbledore.

Harry slowly made his way around the table and when he was at arms length, his Uncle snapped out his hand faster than should be possible for a man of his size. Pulling Harry's face closer to his, he whispered in a deadly voice.

'If you dare threaten me and my family you can forget about living under my roof. Maybe I'll find this hoobly-whats-it-lord myself and hand you right over. Would serve you right. You think I don't have ways of making you write those letters boy?" Vernon saw a flicker of fear spark through Harry's eyes and twisted his ear harder. With satisfied glee he continued. "That's right, you know exactly what I'm talking about. We've been through this already"

And as quickly as he had grabbed Harry, he released him and backhanded him across the face. Harry, losing his balance, fell hard against the wall and to the floor.

"Now let that be a lesson to you." His Uncle turned around now content to ignore his bleeding nephew.

Harry made his way off of the floor feeling the lump that was beginning to form on the back of his head. There was blood coming down the side of his face where his Uncle's wedding ring had cut him.

"Your hair is getting too long, I'm cutting it tonight. Lord knows Marge won't want to look at you anymore than we do." Aunt Petunia spat at Harry as though nothing has happened. She sneered at him with disdain, her nose wrinkling in disgust as a drop of blood hit her pristine floor. "And clean that up! Now!"

Harry made for the kitchen to fetch some paper towels, knowing better than to use an actual towel to clean the mess. He quickly washed the cut on his face, grabbed the disinfectant from under the sink and made his way back to the dining room. Once that was clean, he quietly made his way to the cupboard.

XxXxXxXxXx

Thirty minutes later, and with a pounding headache, his Aunt was rapping her knuckles on the cupboard door.

"Get out here, clean this mess and be quick about it!"

As Harry made his way out of the cupboard, he looked to the right at the Dursley's who were sprawled out in the the living room to watch television and gossip about Mr. Next Door Neighbor who, Petunia had discovered, wears a toupee over his bald head.

Harry cleaned the table and washed the dishes. He was heading back to the cupboard when Aunt Petunia called to him.

"Boy get in the kitchen, time for your haircut." She screeched walking past Harry's cupboard to the kitchen. Harry followed absentmindedly brushing his hair out of his face. It felt longer. He ran a hand through. It was all the way down to his chin, it had certainly not been like that in the morning, had it? Stranger things had happened he thought, recalling all the times his hair had gown back after visits to the barber and even when his Aunt had given him his near bald haircut. Then again...This wasn't quite the same.

"Aunt Petunia, may I use the bathroom first?" Harry asked as he reached the doorway to the kitchen.

"Hurry up then." Petunia snapped back growing agitated as she laid a sheet out under the chair he was to have his hair cut in.

Harry headed upstairs to the bathroom and looked in to the mirror. His emerald green eyes widened in shock. His hair was no longer messy and unkempt, on the contrary, it was long and straight. He didn't think it looked bad but he wondered how it could have happened.

He shook his head, he did not have time to ponder it now, it would have to wait until later. He headed back downstairs and then sat in the chair that Petunia had set in the kitchen on top of the raggedy old bed sheet.

"Sit!" She barked. Harry obeyed and she began to cut his hair. Harry watched as his hair began to fall mercilessly on to the sheeted floor. If he was honest with himself he really didn't want to see it go. He thought it actually made him look a bit older and somehow more mature.

When she had finished cutting his hair Harry went back to the cupboard under the stairs and looked into the mirror Ginny had given him. He had to admit the haircut his Aunt gave him this time wasn't as bad as the buzz cut and his hair didn't look all that bad straight. Harry figured that if it hadn't been for Aunt Marge coming tomorrow, she would have buzzed all of it off, again.

He set the mirror down and went to bed, the Dursley's had long since burned the cot that used to serve as his bed. He was tired from being up so early and in no way looking forward to the next day.

Uncle Vernon would be picking Marge up tomorrow morning at the train station. Upon her arrival at Number 4 Privet Drive, Harry would have to endure a few days of Marge's cruel taunting and snide remarks. He could do this, he'd done it before and he'd do it again. Well, discounting the summer before his third year. That was a fluke he told himself, he was older now. He would have better self-control, he wasn't entirely convinced.

Exhausted from the days activities he thought briefly of the Dreamless Sleep potions that had been delivered to him that morning. No, he shook his head, he needed to save the Dreamless Sleep for when Marge stayed, he couldn't risk having nightmares while she was here. He could only imagine the punishment then. He closed his eyes and did his best to Occlude, shortly after he felt into an uncomfortable sleep.

XxXxXx

Well, there you have it, Chapter One! I hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I am already working on the next chapter revision. Reviews, questions, suggestions and comments always welcome. See you all soon! ~Bria Snape


	2. Fractured

Welcome to Chapter Two of Rude Awakenings! A big thank you to those who reviewed on the last chapter. I love hearing from you and being able to respond to you as well. Look for my owl. :-)

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and Co.

Chapter 2: Fractured

Harry woke up early the next morning and stared at the inside of his cupboard for the better part of a half hour, mentally preparing himself for the day ahead. When he finally rolled over and made his way from the cupboard he peered out the window over the kitchen sink. It was rainy and gray, perfectly reflecting Harry's mood. Harry forced himself to put one foot in front of the other as he made his trek to the upstairs bathroom, absentmindedly pushing back the hair from his eyes. He stopped abruptly. Hair shouldn't be in his eyes, Aunt Petunia had only just cut it the night before. He took the last few stairs at a clipped pace and, flipping the bathroom light on, gazed at himself in the mirror.

What was going on? His hair had grown back right down to his chin again. Sure, it wasn't the first time his hair had grown back overnight, but never had it grown as it did now. Aunt Petunia would be furious. Harry turned away from the mirror and turned on the tap to the shower, he had perfected the two minute shower. After all, good hot water shouldn't be wasted on scrawny, waste-of-space freaks.

When he was out of the shower, he toweled off his hair and tucked it behind his ears. He stared at his reflection a bit longer, there was a gaunt look about his face as well, he knew he hadn't been eating enough, but the way his cheek bones were pronounced made him resolve to make more of an effort. He certainly didn't need any questions when he got back to school. Thinking to the rock cakes and chocolate frogs in his cupboard, he committed himself to eating them all before the new term started. It would be a start at least. Stepping on the scale, he looked down, he had lost one and a half stones in the month since he had been back. Sighing, he quickly dressed and made his way downstairs to begin breakfast.

At seven o'clock Uncle Vernon came down and poured himself a cup of coffee, picking up the morning paper Harry had set out on the table. Without saying a word to Harry, he then left to pick up Aunt Marge from the train station. As Harry made to clear Uncle Vernon's coffee cup from the table Aunt Petunia entered the kitchen, ignoring Harry as Vernon had done. He didn't mind, he preferred it really. Except...

He shouldn't do it, he knew, he was just asking for trouble, but he couldn't resist.

"Good Morning!" Harry said smiling at his Aunt, taunting her by running a hand through his newly grown locks. His Aunt barely looked up, hoping to be able to ignore the boy but with a double take shrieked."You…I…How?" For once, she appeared at a loss for words. She was clenching her horsy-faced jaw. She sent him a disgusted glare and left the kitchen, presumably to wake up the fat lump that was Dudley.

Sure enough, a few minutes later, Harry heard Dudley thumping down the stairs, whining loudly about being starved. They were to have a late breakfast that day when Marge arrived and poor precious Diddykins could not fathom the idea of a late breakfast. Dudley came around the corner of the kitchen with his Smeltings stick in hand and with a forceful whack to the back of Harry's leg, demanded food just as Harry had bent down to but the breakfast bake into the oven.

Falling forward, and trying to prevent his head from going into the oven, the egg mix splattered all over the ground. Infuriated, Harry spun on his cousin.

"You idiot!" Harry screamed, his hand instinctively hovering over the pocket that hid his wand.

Dudley's eyes flicked to the pocket then back to Harry. Harry smirked at his cousin and raised an eyebrow. Dudley hoofed it out of the kitchen, yelling for his mum all the while. Great, he was really in for it now and there were no more eggs in the fridge to start again. He closed his eyes wracking his mind for what else he could quickly prepare to avoid his Uncle's wrath. Petunia made it downstairs from the bathroom just as Harry got to his knees and began cleaning the mess in the kitchen.

"What have you done?!" She screeched picking up a frying pan from the counter. "Out, out! Vernon will deal with you when he gets home." Harry just narrowly missed the swipe from the pan as he ran out of the kitchen and into his cupboard. He was in for it now, and with Hedwig still out, he had no way of getting a message to the Order, would they come even if he did? He sat in the cupboard, knees drawn up to his chest and waited for the inevitable. He could hear his Aunt ranting from the kitchen about filthy, useless freaks and how they would now have to go out for breakfast.

Harry stiffened as not ten minutes later Marge's bird-like screech of a voice rang through the hall.

"Where's my little Dudders?" Aunt Marge cooed, Harry could hear the tags on the collar of one of her bull dogs, most likely Ripper, trailing her into the house. It stopped and the cupboard door and growled.

"Boy! Get out her and take Marge's suitcase upstairs!" Vernon barked as he banged his fist on the cupboard door.

"Yes, Uncle Vernon." He knew if was only a matter of seconds, possibly minutes, before his Uncle realized that breakfast had been ruined. As he made for Marge's suitcase in the entry way, avoiding the bull dog who was snapping at his heels, Dudley waddled out to greet his Aunt. Harry knew that the only reason Dudley pried his eyes away from the television was because he got paid by Aunt Marge. Sure enough he had a crisp ten pound note in his big piggy fist when he pulled away from her. Harry didn't think he would hug Aunt Marge even if he was paid to. Harry couldn't stop the eye roll that followed that display.

"How dare you roll your eyes!" Aunt Marge said fixing Harry with her usual hateful stare and surveying him from head to toe. "You need to get something done with that hair boy. You're making my brother look bad. Now hurry and take my trunks upstairs! Are you deaf?"

Harry complied lugging her trunks slowly up the staircase and into his old room. He didn't know if he wanted to move back in after Aunt Marge was going to be living in it for days. He would have to decontaminate it. Too bad he couldn't use magic outside of school so he could Scourgify the whole place after she left.

He trudged downstairs and was hoping he could make it back to his cupboard unnoticed. Petunia was still getting ready to go out in the bathroom, so he had a short reprieve from what he knew was to come. Aunt Marge, Uncle Vernon and Dudley had all settled in the living room. As he moved to unlatch the cupboard round one of Harry bashing began as Marge barked from the living room.

"Don't you ever take showers boy? Your hair is just radiating with grease, it's filthy."

"They only let me shower on the full moon." Harry replied smugly, as he leaned on the doorway to the living room. He was already in trouble, what was a little more? So much for pretending to be good. He would never move on by moping around all the time. And what about his hair, Marge was delusional, it looked fine, he'd only washed it an hour before.

"Don't be smart with me boy, like I've said, if you would have been dropped on my doorstep it would have been straight to the orphanage with you. Although I can't see how they would want you either." She paused, looking almost thoughtful about this, but then shook her head as though any thought of Harry was a waste of time.

"You should show some appreciation, if they hadn't taken me in your brother would be de…"

"Would you like some tea, Marge?" Uncle Vernon cut in glaring at Harry who smirked back but inside winced knowing what would be coming later.

"Oh no, thank you, Vernon." Marge replied.

"How is your bulldog business going Marge?" Vernon asked trying to keep Aunt Marge from asking Harry to continue what he was saying.

"I had to have Colonel Fubster drown two puppies the other day, they weren't quite up to standards, both runts. Nasty little things."

"You know that's wrong don't you?" Harry didn't really care what happened anymore. He had a new sense of daring that suddenly burst into him, but the feeling felt somewhat foreign at the same time. Voldemort... Ugh, what a terrible time for him to crop up, Voldemort was feeling daring a lot these days and Harry knew it. It had gotten him in trouble more than once this summer and he had the bruises to show for it.

"I knew the boy was daft Vernon, but really? Get rid of the weak and keep the strong. If it were like that with humans the world would be a lot better place if you ask me. For one, you wouldn't be darkening my dear brother's doorstep."

"Yeah, sure, I agree. A lot of power hungry people killing each sounds great to me." Harry replied sarcastically, resisting the urge to roll his eyes again.

"Boy I think you've said quite enough, keep your mouth shut and show some respect." Uncle Vernon glared violently, sharply tilting his head to the left, silently signifying Harry best make his way to the cupboard.

"No Vernon let him speak." Marge waved him off with her stubby fingers adorned with costume jewelry rings from knuckle to nail.

"Nope I'm done." Harry replied smugly, crossing his arms and making to turn around.

"Vernon, does he still attend St. Brutus'?" Aunt Marge inquired turning to face Uncle Vernon.

"Yes, why?"

"And are they beating you boy?" She hollered down the hall, Harry turned on his heel.

"Yeah, they are. They put me through the ringer at the end of the year before I showed them a thing or two." Harry was feeling extremely reckless and his scar was twinging making him irritable and more on edge. He needed to stop, he knew he needed to stop, but he just couldn't. These emotions were making him reckless. If would have just tried harder in Occlumency lessons this wouldn't have been an issue. Then again with the way Snape was teaching...

"Go to your cupboard." Uncle Vernon roared, making to get out of his chair and force him in if need be.

"Fine! I spilled breakfast this morning by the way, you'd have found out soon enough anyway." Harry turned around knocking a vase of flowers to the ground with the flat of his hand. He would have to clean it up anyway, what would it matter.

At once, he heard the creak of the living room floor and then felt one of Uncle Vernon's great beefy fists clench around his wrist. Harry already knew what was coming he whirled around and tried to duck but his Uncle delivered a heavy blow to the side of his face.

"That's right Vernon, that's what the boy needs. Give 'em the old one-two!" Marge cheered as though Harry bashing was a spectator sport. As quickly as his temper had come earlier, it left him now. What had he done? Why had he egged them on? Mentally kicking himself he tried to brace as well as he could for what he knew was to follow.

Pinning Harry up against the wall another heavy blow was delivered to Harry's face. This wasn't new to him and he knew the best thing to do was not fight it.

"No breakfast? Terrible attitude? You know what you deserve!" Vernon yelled getting spittle all over Harry's face. Harry was thrown to the ground and he immediately regretted breaking the glass flower vase as the shards dug into his back. A heavy boot came down on his chest and the pieces were drove further into his back. He tried to roll away from the broken bits, but he was caught by another kick to the stomach, followed by another and another. Harry bit his lip and closed his eyes trying not to scream. Harry's resolve broke when Vernon wrenched him by the arm to turn him around to have better access to his back. Harry heard a sick crack and a pain radiated through his arm so intense that the last thing he remembered before blacking out was a pool of red on the floor and the feel of the belt buckle on his back.

XxXxXxXx

Well, that's that! Sorry for the short chapter, it just made sense to stop it there. Reviews, questions, suggestions and comments always welcome. See you all soon! ~BriaSnape


	3. Rescued Soul

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and Co.

Chapter 3: Rescued Soul

The first thing that assailed Harry's senses as he fought to open his eyes two days later was the stench in the cupboard, followed quickly by the searing pain throughout his body. The cupboard was a mingled scent of sweat and dried blood. The smell causing Harry to roll over and vomit violently onto the floor. As he tried to move away from the new mess he bit down hard on his lip to avoid calling out from the pain, drawing blood. His back felt like it was on fire, his Uncle has thrown him into the cupboard unceremoniously where he lie on his back until now, the glass shards from the vase finding their way deeper into his flesh. The shirt he had on Tuesday, now ripped to shreds from the belt, stuck to the ripped flesh of his back along with dirt and debris from the cupboard floor.

He slowly and painfully made his way to lay on his side leaning up with his one good arm and squinted at the red numbers of the clock he had brought down from his bedroom. It was late evening, Thursday, by the date on the clock. It took Harry a moment for his thoughts to catch up to him from the brutality of Tuesday. As they surfaced to the front of his mind, he groaned at how stupid he has been. Why had he goaded Aunt Marge and Uncle Vernon? At least Marge would be gone now.

Ever since Harry had returned to Number Four Privet Drive for the summer, he had been fighting with emotions that weren't his own. It took him a week or so to realize where they were coming from and he had struggled to ignore them each time. His first week home he had been working in the garden when he felt a surge of unfiltered happiness, which conflicted greatly with the heavy rock of grief that had been sitting in his stomach every second since Sirius passed through the veil. He found himself laughing uncontrollably as he was pulling weeds, which earned himself a cuff in the head from Uncle Vernon for making too much noise.

In fact, the only thing that seemed to bring him back to himself, other than Voldemort's waning emotions, was pain; a cuff in the head, a rough kick to the shin, or a fist yanking him by the hair. As twisted as he knew it was, he couldn't help but be grateful for the relief a smack to the head brought from the invading feelings. What would normally equal a summer of abuses at the Dursley's hands, had only taken two weeks to wrack up. But the pain he was in now, it didn't compare to anything they had done to him yet.

Harry squinted his eyes against the headache that was building, opening his eyes again the numbers blurred on his clock until they were unreadable. Another wave of nausea blanketed him and he turned his head as best as he could to relieve himself, but with the little bit of food from days prior already expunged from his system, nothing but bile made it's way out. His ears began to ring and before he passed out again, falling harshly onto his back, he wondered why the Order had yet to appear.

The next morning, Harry woke to the Dursley's coming down the stairs. Dudley jumping on each stair causing dust to flutter down onto Harry. Harry coughed weakly, but could not focus on his surroundings, he couldn't remember where he was or why.

"Boy," he heard Uncle Vernon roar. "Where's our breakfast? You've been enough of a laze this week!" The lock on Harry's cupboard was unlocked and Vernon stuck his big beefy head in. He pulled Harry out by his long hair and threw him against the wall.

"We want our breakfast. Get in there and cook it now!" Uncle Vernon bellowed spittle hitting Harry in the process. Harry tried to struggle to his feet. Vernon realizing the state Harry was in made to throw him back into the cupboard, more than happy to forget about him, when Petunia came down the stairs. She gasped and her hands came up to cover her mouth.

"Vernon! They _will_ find out about this. You know I have no love for the boy, but they can't find him like this."

"Just leave him Tuney, if they haven't shown up yet they're not coming. They don't care for the boy, why should we?" Petunia pinched her horsey face, but didn't argue. Instead she turned for the bathroom, grabbed a bottle of hydrogen peroxide and poured it over Harry's back. He screamed, not remembering why he was hurt to begin with and the peroxide fizzed in his wounds.

"Put him back in the cupboard Vernon, I can't stand to look at him." As Vernon made to grab Harry by the hair again the front door flew open, hitting the wall with a loud "thwack!"

Harry's vision cleared long enough to see, standing in the broken doorway, people in robes. His vision focused long enough for him to make out who they were. It was Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, and to his surprise, the one and only, Severus Snape. Snape and Harry locked eyes briefly before Harry's head hit the floor, giving in to the blackness that called for him once again.

Snape stared at the boy on the floor. What on earth had he just walked in on? Harry was a pampered little prat, all the evidence pointed to it. So then, why was he on the floor looking as though he had just been on the receiving end of a very dark curse? This couldn't be the mighty Potter that strutted around the corridors at Hogwarts. They must have gotten the wrong house, it certainly didn't look like Potter lying there on the floor. Beaten body aside, the hair and the face were all wrong. How and why would Albus allow Harry to return here during the summer if these atrocities were going on.

Did Albus even know about this for that matter? He certainly didn't care for the boy, but seeing him lying crumpled and broken on the floor brought back such horrible memories from his own past. One's he had successfully repressed for many years.

Remus swept down to Harry's level on the floor and carefully inspected him, healing was not his strong suit, he turned to Snape.

"Severus, please." Remus pleaded turning worried eyes to the Potions Master.

Severus stepped forward, indicating harshly for Remus to move out of the way. The Dursley's only concern was trying to replace the door that was off the hinges so no one saw the freaks that were in their home. Snape moved his wand in a few quick complicated motions to surmise the extent of the damage. He turned from his spot crouched on the floor to address Remus and Tonks briefly.

"Concussion, broken ribs, dislocated arm, multiple lacerations to the back with infection setting in." Snape rattled off in a clinical tone. "Poppy will need to tend to him immediately if we are to avoid any further damage." Without bothering to explain, he uncorked a grass colored potion from his robes and poured it over the broken child's back. It hissed as the dirt and debris dissolved from the deep lashes in his back, the glass and shirt shreds still lingering.

"Severus, he cannot apparate in this condition, we need to get him to Arabella's house and through the Floo." Remus stepped forward, cast a Petrificus Totalus to avoid jostling the boy any and conjured up a stretcher to set the injured wizard on. Finally having gotten the door back in the frame, Vernon imprudently addressed the three fully grown wizards in his home.

"OUT! OUT NOW! You have your freak, now get out of my home and leave my family be!" Vernon bellowed shooing them with his hands.

"You dare tell us what to do? After the atrocities you have committed here?" Out of all the things Snape expected doing this summer sticking up for Potter was not one of them. He had expected being called to Death Eater meetings and being badgered by Albus to lighten up and have an occasional lemon drop but _certainly_ not this. Although he also never imagined that the almighty Harry Potter would be beaten to within an inch of his life by his Aunt and Uncle. With the evidence in front of him he could no longer deny it.

He still didn't like the boy. But he should have noticed the signs before. He knew that Potter didn't like attention, (despite the fact Snape tried to rub it in that he was an attention-seeking prat) noticed how he quivered under Snape's glares, and flinched when he called him 'boy', he even saw him flinch a few time when people had run into him in the corridors.

"GET OUT!" Uncle Vernon bellowed. Remus looked at Snape from the corner of his eye. His typical impassive, bored expression now graced his face, as though he had not spoken at all. He was taken aback that Snape had opened his mouth. With a steely glint in his eye he turned to address the Dursley's.

"I must advise you Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, that you will be hearing from us again. We cannot allow this barbaric behavior to go unaddressed. Now, if you will point me in the direction of Harry's school things, we can then depart from your home that gives me no pleasure to be in."

With death glares from the senior Dursleys, Petunia pointed a bony finger at the cupboard under the stairs. Tonks moved forward to help Remus gather the belongings. As they opened the cupboard the sight and smell that met them was overwhelming. And tears threatened both of their eyes.

Amongst a pile of old tattered blankets was a mix of dried blood and vomit, it was obvious this was where Harry had been sleeping. Remus looked up and noticed the drawing on the ceiling, as Tonks quickly packed up and shrunk Harry's belongings. Remus reached up to grab the picture taped to the ceiling, folded it gently and placed it in his pocket.

Not sparing one more glance for the Dursley's, afraid that he would not leave them unharmed if he did, Remus cast a disillusionment charm over himself and Harry. Snape and Tonks quickly mimicked his movement and they walked swiftly to Arabella Figg's house, a snowy white owl trailing them through the floo.

XxXxXx

The trio stepped through the floo to the infirmary, Harry and Hedwig in tow.

"Poppy!" Remus called making his way to the medi-witches office as Tonks levitated Harry gently to a clean bed and canceled the spell keeping him immobile. He opened the door to her office as she was lifting a cup of tea to her pursed lips.

"What on earth, Remus? Are you alright?" She asked gently setting her cup onto her floral pink saucer.

"It's Harry, come quick." Wasting no time she stood up from her desk, nearly knocking her tea over onto her supply order forms.

"Oh, Potter, what have you gotten yourself into this time?" She followed Remus over to the bed furthest to the hospital wing door. She allowed a brief look of shock to pass over her face before going into full medi-witch mode.

"Details Remus." She commanded as she waved her hand over the boys injured form ascertaining all his injuries. Remus feeling the weight of the situation finally sink into him, stuttered to form words.

"Well, you see, it...it appears his relatives have no love for the boy. I knew his home life was difficult, but nothing of this magnitude ever crossed my mind as a possibility. He never said..." He trailed off, covering his face with a scarred hand. Snape stepped forward casting a disgusted glare at Remus for his emotional display.

"If I may, Madame. My assessment at his home," Snape couldn't help but to sneer at this word, "revealed a grade three concussion, four broken ribs, a dislocated arm and multiple lacerations to the back with infection setting in. I administered a solvent to the boy's back to help with the infection and rid him of the dirt and debris. However, the potion is not made for items of a more solid nature, such as glass and cotton as you can well see."

"Yes, very good Severus. My scan reveals as much as well. If you would all leave me to work I am afraid this may take a while. Severus if you would be kind enough to bring me the potions you were brewing for this years stock, I fear I may have need for a great many of them."

"Of course." He turned on his heel and left the infirmary. Tonks had already flooed back to headquarters and only Remus remained. Taking in the condition of his best friends only son and shaking his head.

"I failed them. James, Lily and Harry..."

"Remus, please. I understand you are upset, but I must attend to the boy with no distractions." She turned to him a little more kindly and said. "I will alert you as soon as I am through treating him. If you could kindly inform the headmaster of the events of today."

"Yes, of course, Poppy. You're right, of course. Thank you." He gave her a grim smile and headed to inform the headmaster of this most unsettling development.

XxXxXxXx

Harry slowly opened his eyes, blinking rapidly as they adjusted to the incoming light from the tall windows. Looking around he knew exactly where he was, he just couldn't remember why. He was in the Infirmary at Hogwarts. He had been there more than enough times to recognize it, if only by the sterile smell that made him cringe.

He tried to prop himself up, but his arms were too shaky to hold his own weight. Groaning he settled down into the bed and resolved himself to staring at the ceiling. Madame Pomfrey heard him rustling and bustled over to him, her medi-witch robes swishing around her.

"Oh Mr. Potter, you're up! Here take this, quickly now, it'll help the pain." She said handing Harry a goblet with a warm yellowish colored liquid in it. Harry reached for it carefully feeling sluggish and trying not to spill the goblet onto the crisp white hospital linens.

"Madame Pomfrey, what happened? Last I remember..." He searched his mind for the last thing that he remembered and came up blank. "Umm, last thing I remember..." He was saved by Madame Pomfrey who stepped in.

"Mr. Potter, you were the victim of horrible abuse at the hands of your relatives. It is not surprising that the events are not jumping to the forefront of your mind, you suffered quite a severe concussion, amongst other damage ." She looked at him kindly and then tilted her head, "That potion should have kicked in by now. How are you feeling, Mr. Potter?"

Harry shook out his limbs experimentally. They felt tight, but nothing to how they had when he woke up. He turned and stretched from side to side and almost took in a breath from the raw feeling of his back.

"I feel fine, Madame." He replied. She surveyed him not looking entirely convinced, but continued all the same.

"Too right." She muttered with a hint or sarcasm. "Now! I told the headmaster and Remus Lupin that I would let them know as soon as you were awake. If you'll excuse me Potter."

"Madame Pomfrey," Harry called out as she made for the floo in her office, "How long was I asleep for?"

"Here? Three days dear." She called back from her office door.

Three days...he had been out for three whole days. He still didn't have half as many answers as he would like as to why he was here and in this state. Catching the calendar on the wall, he had an image of a red clock with the date 3rd August, 1996 flash into his minds eye. With that image followed a scent that nearly caused him to vomit over the side of the bed, of blood...and bile. He squinched his eyes tightly, trying to think back over the last few days. As he forced his stomach to settle, images from the past week started to float through his brain.

Aunt Marge's unpleasant arrival, the foolhardy feeling that had curled into his gut as he egged Aunt Marge and Uncle Vernon on, the sear of pain as glass pressed through his flesh into his back, the sound of his Uncle's belt as it made it's way through the air, waking up in the cupboard wondering where the Order was and why they hadn't come for him yet, Snape and Lupin and Tonks, and then...nothing...Nothing but a white hot anger that stirred in him. This time the anger was entirely his own.

And it was that anger Albus Dumbledore was met with when he crossed the threshold of Madame Pomfrey's office, Lupin in tow, to inquire upon Harry's state from the boy himself. If he was taken aback by the rage that now filled the changed boys face he made no mention of it. Simply settled into a chair at his bedside and fixed Harry with a twinkly gaze, purple starry robes gathered about him.

"Harry, my dear boy, how do you find yourself today? A might bit better now that our esteemed medi-witch and Potions professor have patched you up I imagine."

"Better?! Better than what?! The three days I lay on the floor of that cupboard waiting for the Order to show up? Better than how I was when I was forced to go back to the Dursley's after my Godfather's death? Where were you, why were you late? You should have been there the first night. I didn't write!" Harry's head dropped to look at his lap and Lupin made his way to his side, resting a hand on the distraught boys back. "I didn't write." He muttered again quieter this time, trying to keep his tears in check.

"Harry, I am aware that the Order was not timely in their recovery of you and for that I can only offer you my deepest apologies." Albus lowered his head in a show of remorse. "I am afraid that there have been more raids as of late, on muggle and wizard villages a like, and our resources have been sparse. As I am only human myself, I made a mistake in the way I positioned our people that left you susceptible. I blame no one but myself for this lapse and only hope that you can find it within you to forgive me."

At this Dumbledore looked up and Harry surveyed the man in front of him. He hated it when the Professor played the human card! And the way he talked about the Order as resources? He seemed remorseful, but it was always so damn hard to tell with Dumbledore. He was what? One hundred years old or so? How do you stay mad at a one hundred year old man? Harry ran a hand through his hair in frustration, was he being manipulated or was he sincere. He had been seriously hurt and no one had been there for him. He looked up through a part in his hair to the old wizard in front of him and sighed. What was that saying? 'Don't burn a bridge you may want to cross again?' Moody's words 'Constant Vigilence," rang through his head and he looked Albus straight in the eyes.

"Alright, Professor, but I don't want to go back to that house again."

Albus just surveyed Harry with a look that seemed to say 'we will see,' but instead said, "We will cross that bridge when we come to it, Harry. After all your mothers protection is of great importance to you and we can always increase the watch on your home."

Harry grit his teeth, but resisted a come-back when he felt Remus squeeze his shoulder affectionately. He couldn't help thinking, maybe he should have burned that bridge anyway. He was torn from his musings as Albus turned to the newest occupant of the room.

"Ah, Severus!"

"You wished to see me, Headmaster." Snape stated hoping Albus would simply get to the point, he had been kept very busy by all the potions he had to brew to restock everything the Potter brat had needed.

"Yes, this bring me to the next part of our conversation. Harry I must ask you, have you had any visions this summer. From Voldemort, I should say."

"No, professor. Not since..." He broke off and swallowed around the lump in his throat. "Not since Sirius, Sir."

Albus seemed to ponder this only briefly.

"As I thought. I imagine since he has forayed into your mind, however briefly, and felt the raw power of love there, he would want to stay as far away from it as possible. He may in fact, now be employing Occlumency against you." The headmaster fixed Harry with a piercing stare. "But there is something else you wish to tell me, isn't there Mr. Potter."

Harry sighed and dropped the piece of blanket he had been picking at with his fingers.

"I don't think that can be true, Sir." He said lifting his gaze to the headmasters. "You see, I have these..moments, where I can feel his emotions. It's like..it feels like they are my emotions. I know they're not, but I can't seem to stop them from taking me over. Unless..."

"Unless what, Harry." Albus encouraged kindly.

"Unless I feel pain, that seems to knock them right out of my system." He looked back down ashamed. He could see Snape growing impatient out of the corner of his eye. He knew where this was headed and was not happy about it. Sure enough.

"I believe it would be wise for you and Professor Snape to resume Occlumency lessons once again Harry. I think they could only be beneficial to you, it would be unfortunate if we had such incidences during the school year."

"Headmaster, surely last year's _display_ should be enough to show you that Potter has no interest in learning what-so-ever." He fixed Harry with a level gaze and, unless Harry was very much mistaken, it had a little less bite than usual to it. The headmaster continued on as though he did not hear this statement.

"In fact, I think it best if he was provided with some additional Defense lessons as well this summer, Severus."

"Headmaster, surely you can't be serious. If we could take about this, alone." He ground out, indicating towards the solace of Madame Pomfrey's office.

"Nonsense, Severus. What is there to discuss?" He said with that annoying twinkle in his eye.

"I have potions to brew, lessons to teach and meetings to attend Albus, you seem to be laboring under some delusion that I have nothing but time on my hands. Let me break that fantasy for you. I do not have time to teach some brat who has no inclination to learn how to defend himself, mentally or otherwise!"

"Headmaster, if I may, I would be more than happy to help Harry with extra defense lessons." Remus piped up from the side of Harry's bed. Harry perked up with the idea, defense with Lupin, now that he could do!

"I do appreciate the offer Remus, but I am afraid I have some Order business that will need your attention until the school year resumes, perhaps at that time lessons could be handed to you. However no one knows better what to prepare Harry for than Severus given his history."

"I cannot teach someone who does not want to learn!" Severus ground out one more time. "It is impossible."

"Oh, come now, Severus! I'm sure Harry would have every intention of learning should you put the time and effort into it. Isn't that right, Mr. Potter."

Harry had been silent until this moment, but had been mulling it all over. He did need to learn and fast. He would be entering his sixth year and the more he could learn to protect himself, and more importantly, his friends, the better. And he couldn't risk exploding on his friends again like he had so many times last year. He really needed to get his emotions under control and as much as it pained him to admit it, there was no better than Severus Snape to teach him. He didn't have to like it, but he did need to prepare himself.

" I would, Professor's. I promise I will work harder this year." He said pointedly, addressing Snape directly. "The stakes are high and I don't have time to be a child about it anymore."

Snape couldn't hide the shock that briefly flitted across his face at Potter's new found responsibility, but recovered quickly.

"Hmph. We'll see how long that attitude lasts." He surveyed Harry a moment longer and then concluded. "Very well, as soon as Madame Pomfrey clears you we will set up a time schedule for lessons. I expect you to be on time, show the proper deference to the subjects and to me."

With that he turned on his heel and made to leave the infirmary for the cool temperatures of his dungeons.

"Oh, Severus," Albus called after him. "Mr. Potter will be needing a room to stay, as it would make no sense for him to lodge in Gryffindor tower by himself. Meeting with you for multiple lessons a week I believe the guest quarters across from your rooms would suffice. If you could prepare them?"

The only response the Headmaster received was a simultaneous groan from both the Potions Professor and Harry. With a smile to himself he turned to Harry and offered, "Lemon drop?"

XxXxXxXxXx

Reviews, questions, suggestions and comments always welcome. See you all soon! ~BriaSnape


	4. Harry's Silver Lining

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and Co.

Chapter 4: Harry's Silver Lining

Harry was released in the evening two days later with strict instructions to head straight to the dungeons. Harry, however, had no intention of following such instructions. What he really wanted was some fresh air. Snape could wait. After all, how often was it one got to be at Hogwarts without students milling about everywhere. And he really should visit Hedwig. The bird was bound to be angry at him by now for not visiting.

Harry made his way across the Entrance Hall, savoring the feeling of being home, despite the circumstances that got him there. He pushed open the heavy wooden door and stepped out onto the stone steps. Turning his face up to the sky, eyes closed, he took a deep breath. Yes, this is what home smelled like.

He leisurely made his way across the grounds, waving to the giant squid floating lazily around the lake. He thought he see a tentacle wave back at him, but shook his head. A trick of the light, surely.

When he reached the owlry he looked up, he had forgotten how many stairs there were to the top. Madame Pomfrey had warned him not to over exert himself, but surely if they expected him to walk down all the stairs to the dungeons he could handle the owlry just fine.

Halfway up the owlry stairs he had to pause for a break, feeling slightly winded. He took the opportunity to catch his breath and stare out over the grounds. His eyes fell upon Hagrid working in the gardens, digging unnaturally large potatoes out of the earth, Fang at his heels. He would bet ten galleons that a certain magical pink umbrella had been involved. Resuming his trek, he made a mental note to visit his hairy friend soon.

Harry reached the top of the owlry ten minutes later. Bending over and resting his hands on his knees, he caught his breath and then straightened up to summon his familiar.

"Hedwig, here girl!" he trilled holding out an arm for her to land on. Seconds later the beautiful snow white owl swooped down from the high rafters, landed on Harry's arm and pecked at his hand as if expecting treats.

"Sorry girl, I haven't been able to get to my trunk yet. I promise I'll give you extra treats when I do." Hedwig nipped at his hand once more and then preened the long strands of his hair affectionately as if to say, 'I'll let it pass this time, human.'

Harry chuckled to himself softly and carried the bird to an open window. Setting her on the ledge he stroked her soft white plumage and resumed his survey of the grounds.

"The Quidditch pitch is looking good this year, girl. I wonder if I'll be able to get back on the team. I can't imagine Umbridge's ban would hold up now that she's gone." The bird hooted softly in response, turning her neck just so and Harry knew she wanted him to scratch her favorite spot.

"Can you believe I'm supposed to start up Defense _and_ Occlumency lessons with Snape this summer? And, what's worse! They want me to live in the dungeons with him." Harry made a face of disgust, screwing you his face and sticking out his tongue. "It's so cold and boring down there. I know I need to learn it, but really? Isn't it enough to take the extra lessons, now I have to stay down there too?"

Harry sighed and edged himself up onto the cold stone of the open window next to Hedwig. She nipped his hand harshly as if to remind him he could not fly and not to fall. Harry stroked the bird reassuringly looking out into the setting sun and sitting quietly.

It looked like Hagrid had gone in for the night, the light from his fireplace shining out from the stained glass windows of his hut causing an array of jeweled colors to dance across the ground outside. He jumped down from the window, dusting off his hands, maybe he could manage a quick visit before the sun set completely.

Bidding Hedwig goodnight and promising again to have extra treats for her soon, he made his way back down the owlry stairs. As he reached the landing and made to turn towards Hagrid's a hand suddenly shot out and grabbed his shoulder whirling him around.

"Mr. Potter! Do you find yourself so above instruction that you feel you may do as you please?" Snape stood there, intimidating cloak billowing out in the soft summer breeze, irritation clearly written in the lines of his face. He continued, pushing Harry towards the school, not giving him a chance to respond.

"Move! Do you think I have nothing better do than to track down wayward teens? I assure you that is not the case."

"I just wanted a few minutes to myself alright?!" Harry shot back, trying to dig his heels into the ground and get away from Snape's grasp, finally he twisted away to follow the man.

"And did it not occur to you, that had you done as you were told you may have had just that? As it is, you have now wasted an hour of my time and I am in no mood now to accommodate any such requests. We have items to discuss tonight and I do not want to be kept any longer than necessary."

Snape's long strides were becoming increasingly harder for Harry to keep up with.

"Sir…please." Harry panted bending over to catch his breath.

Snape turned and seeing the pale face of the teen behind him crossed his arms and waiting for the teen to catch his breath. When Harry jogged up to him, breath regained, the Potions Master continued to the castle at an unusually slower pace for the imposing man.

Once they reached his office door he motioned the boy in briskly.

"Sit." He commanded making himself comfortable in his own chair behind his desk. "Now, I want to waste no more time than you have already caused me to lose tonight. Understood."

Harry resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the man in front of him and muttered a faint, "Yes, sir."

"Good. Now, as you know the Headmaster has insisted that we resume your Occlumency lessons along with an added curriculum of Defense. It brings me no pleasure that the remainder of my summer will now be spent teaching a lazy Gryffindor. I expect you to remain respectful at all times, be on time for each lesson, you will do as instructed and you _will_ practice. I shall know if you do not. You _will_ learn, Potter." When Harry did not respond right away, Snape prompted with an impatiently snide, "Understood?"

Harry nodded.

"A verbal answer, Potter!"

"Yes, _sir_!" Harry gritted through clenched teeth.

"My, my. We aren't off to a good start now are we?" Snape pronounced sarcastically.

"Excuse me, _sir!_ But I'm not exactly thrilled by this arrangement either. You didn't really try to teach me Occlumency last year, you all but tore through my mind without giving me a clue on how to defend it."

Severus surveyed Harry over the folded hands in front of his face then held out one hand wandlessly summoning a book from the shelf near his office door. He set it on the desk sliding it across to Harry. Harry reluctantly bent forward to read the cover, _A Beginners Guide to Occlumency: Protecting you mind from Unseen Forces._

"You will have through chapter five read and summarized by your first lesson Monday morning. If I were you I would keep the cheek to a minimum, Mr. Potter. I have little patience for such insolence as you should well know by now." He fixed Harry with a piecing glare.

"Yes, sir." Harry wanted to scream at the man in front of him. No, they weren't off to a good start and if Snape's attitude was anything to go by, lessons wouldn't go any smoother than they had last year. Why had he agreed to this? He knew it was important, but now, sitting across from Snape he couldn't convince himself that he hadn't made a mistake agreeing to this.

"Your schedule for the next week is posted in your room, it will update each week with the revised training sessions. Grab your book and follow me, Potter." Snape stood briskly and crossed the room in three easy strides, yanking open the door and motioning for Harry to move. Harry rose slowly from the stiff chair he had sat in and followed Snape out the door.

Snape led Harry through winding dark corridors, lit by dim torch light, into what felt like the deepest depths of the castle. The corridors became colder and colder as they continued on and in some places the stone walls seemed damp with water. Harry shivered and was about to ask how much longer when Snape stopped abruptly, Harry stopping just inches from colliding into the back of the rigid man.

"This will be your room for the remainder of the summer. My quarters are straight ahead at the end of the hall. You are to disturb me only in case of emergency, nothing short of that. Do I make myself clear?"

Harry stared at the expanse of wall in front of him, it was just cold gray stones. To anyone passing by, it would not draw any attention other than that. He couldn't help but to appreciate the anonymity of it. That wasn't something he ever seemed to have the luxury of in the walls of Hogwarts.

"I'm waiting for an answer, Mr. Potter." Snape raised an eyebrow and tapped a foot impatiently startling Harry from his thoughts.

"Oh, uh. Yes, sir. I understand."

Snape nodded his acceptance of his answer.

"Place your hand here and we shall register you to the wards of the room." Snape directed Harry's hand to a gray stone, the same as any other, with his wand tip. Harry stepped forward and placed his hand on the expanse of wall. Snape tapped his wand at each of his fingertips and the rock glowed silver before fading to a dull blue and then back to its original state.

"Now, to enter your room all you need do is place your hand on this same stone, try it."

"But they all look the same, Professor." Harry had already lost track of what stone he was to place his hand on for entry.

"Do you not have eyes, child? Look!" Snape pointed to a small rune, barely noticeable to the naked eye, etched into the corner of one stone. Harry squinted at it, only making it out by the low light of the torch nearby. He thought it quite easy to miss and if he didn't already know the man beside him was a snarky bastard, he would have said just that.

Harry reached his hand out and placed it on the stone, it glowed a faint blue again and a dark, almost black, wooden door appeared where the stones had been. Harry took an involuntary step back. Magic would never cease to amaze him.

"The only ones keyed to your room at the present time are you and myself. Any further permissions must be granted by me. Now go in and get settled, the house elves have brought your things to the room."

"But, sir. What if I want my friends to visit?"

"You will be far to busy this summer for idle distractions. I suggest you banish the thought from your mind all together. Now _IN_." Snape turned on his heel and made his way to his rooms at the end of the hall. Harry scowled at his back, no visits with his friends. He'd see about that, he wasn't happy with the old wizard, but if need be he would get Dumbledore involved. Only as a last resort though, he wasn't a prisoner down here after all, even though he was beginning to feel it. The appreciation of the anonymity of the room was already fading.

Snape turned around as the door to his own quarters appeared in front of him. "Remember, Potter. chapter five by Monday with summary, no excuses." And with that he stepped inside and slammed the door behind him.

Harry sighed and pushed open the door to his own room feeling utterly defeated. No doubt his room would look like a dungeon prison cell. He crossed the threshold and was stunned at the room before him. No way this was his. It had to be some cruel joke, a glamour that would disappear in the morning. He blinked his eyes a few times and then rubbed at them when the room remained the same.

The door at his back, he had stepped in to a small entry way with a bench and hooks for cloaks to one side, a woven cream rug lay under his feet. As he stepped forward out of the entryway to his left was a sitting area a gray wing-back chair to the side of a darker gray suede couch, a dark blue blanket draped over the back. In front of the couch was an elegant stone fireplace with bookshelves filled to capacity with books surrounding it. It must have been charmed to be fire resistant because that was certainly a fire hazard in the muggle world.

Setting his Occlumency book onto the ebony wood of the coffee table in front of the hearth. He slowly settled into the couch, sinking into the comfort of the cushions. There was already a fire burning merrily in the fireplace and he was tempted to grab the blue blanket from the back of the couch and fall asleep right there. He was exhausted, but the excitement of exploring the room got him to his feet once more.

To the right of the door, and raised from the sitting area by a couple of steps, there was a desk of the same dark wood as the coffee table. The desk was already supplied with spare parchment, various shades of filled ink wells and quills. Above the desk was a single long bookshelf where his school books from the previous year had already been placed. That reminded him, he would have to talk to Dumbledore about a trip to Diagon Alley. Maybe he could see his friends then!

Turning away from his desk his eyes fell upon a large four poster bed with sheer cream and blue hangings with inviting pillows and the plushest dark blue comforter he had seen in his life. He ran his fingers along the edge of the bed but didn't dare try it knowing he'd succumb to sleep in an instant if he did. To the right of the bed was a window seat, although he knew he was too far in the dungeons for it to possibly be a real window, the view was familiar, the window had been charmed to show a view of the grounds from the Gryffindor tower.

Across from the bed was a large wardrobe. He moved to his trunk at the end of the bed, intent on hanging his clothes before finally going to sleep. As he opened the trunk with his initials emblazoned in gold on the top, he found it devoid of any articles of clothing. Padding across the large plush rug under the bed to the wardrobe he opened the doors to find his robes hung neatly and his pajamas folded in a drawer.

Grabbing his nicest pair of blue and white striped pajamas he walked down the stairs, across the cold stone floor, to what he could only assume was the bathroom door. Upon entering he was once again shocked at the enormity of it. It reminded him of the prefects bathroom he had used in his fourth year, although the tub was no where near as big, it had various taps for what he could only assume were the same scents and bubbles he had used trying to solve the golden egg mystery.

A huge yawn escaped Harry before he even could attempt to stifle it and he moved to the sink with it's gilded mirror to brush his teeth. After he was changed he sauntered out to the main living area and surveyed the room at large.

How on earth did he get such a nice room? And from Snape no less. Dumbledore had mentioned these were his guest quarters, so for all he knew they were always this way. That was the most likely answer of course and the house elves would have played a huge part in it too.

Harry's eyes caught on something glinting on the table near the fireplace. He groaned when he realized it was the golden letters from his new Occlumency book. Well, he would have to start on that tomorrow. No use putting it off.

He pulled back the covers on the bed and settled in. He let out a huge sigh of relief as he settled into the most comfortable bed he had ever come across. Lessons with Snape were sure to be miserable, but at least he had one silver lining, a place of refuge to look forward to. He planned on spending a lot of time in his new haven. Setting his glasses on the nightstand he used his wand to extinguish the torches on either side of his bed, only the light from the fireplace fell across his face as Harry Potter fell into a most comfortable sleep.

XxXxXxXxXx

Thank you all so much for reading! I wasn't too thrilled with my last chapter, I felt as though I rushed it, which tends to be a problem of mine when I get excited. I am always working to get better. So, please forgive me friends and I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Next up, lessons with Snape!

Reviews, questions, suggestions and comment always welcome. See you all soon! ~BriaSnape


	5. The Offer

Phew, this is my longest chapter to date, it kind of took on a life of it's own. I thought about breaking it up into two, but I promised lessons with Snape and lessons you shall have! Well, one lesson at least, but I hope you'll agree it was the right place to stop this chapter.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and Co.

Chapter 5: The Offer

Harry woke Sunday morning to the scent of bacon and eggs. Yawning, he stretched his aching limbs and opened his eyes. Sunlight was pouring in from the window next to his four poster bed, shining onto a two person dining table that hadn't been there the night before. On it, an array of breakfast foods were spread out. He made his way off the bed and padded across the plush rug to stare at the food. His stomach grumbled loudly. In his rush to get out of the infirmary yesterday he had eaten the smallest dinner Madame Pomfrey would allow. Not that he had much of an appetite anyway.

He pulled out the chair from the table and sat down, piling a little food from each platter onto his plate, determined to gain his weight back. He ate slowly as he looked out the window to his left, wishing the Gryffindor tower window looked out onto the lake. As soon as the thought crossed his mind, the image shifted from the spread of lush forest to the dark waters of the Black Lake. Harry dropped his fork in surprise. Now this he could get used to!

Grabbing a piece of toast from the table he made his way to the window seat. Tucking his feet underneath him, he looked out over the lake. It was calm and quiet, and if he didn't know better it would seem there wasn't a living creature in it.

Leaning his head back against the wall in his cozy nook he sighed, the rest of this summer was bound to be hell. But really, it couldn't be worse than what he came from. After all, he had spent five years in lessons with Snape. He knew what to expect, knew it was best to keep his nose down and do as he was instructed. Easier said than done though, Snape just seemed to bring out the worst in him and with the rushes of emotions that filtered to him from Voldemort…. Well, he really needed to learn Occlumency.

Harry was startled from his thoughts when a chime, similar to that of a grandfather clock, rang through his room. He twisted his head to the right and saw a glowing piece of parchment affixed to his door. Standing, he began to make his way over to it, but when he stepped on the cold stone, he stopped and made to grab his slippers from the wardrobe instead.

Slippers on, he shuffled across the floor to stare at the parchment. Under the headline of _Sunday_ it read, _10am: Meeting with Professor Dumbledore, Headmasters Office Password: Licorice Wand_ under that it had a section that read _Daily Task Goals: Chapters 1-5 read and summarized in A Beginners Guide to Occlumency: Protecting your mind from Unseen Forces_

This must have been the schedule Snape had referenced the night before _._ Underneath the daily tasks was the schedule for the rest of the week. Ugh, lessons everyday but Sunday with Snape? Well, if the Headmaster wanted to talk with him, he'd have a few things to bring up himself. He needed to keep his sanity if he was expected to defeat the Dark Lord and six days a week in close proximity to Snape would in no way be conducive to his health.

Dumbledore, he didn't know how he currently felt about the Headmaster. Sure, he was a great and powerful wizard, but Harry had recently taken to wondering how much the old wizard cared for his well being. He couldn't possibly have been so blind to his living conditions. There would have been signs to any one who cared to notice. Even in his first year he was scrawnier and smaller than all his classmates. He respected the headmaster, to a certain to degree, but he couldn't rely on him.

He glanced around for a clock to check the time. Above the fireplace, books on either side, was a mantle clock of a handsome wood that sloped on both sides. It was nine o'clock, if he hurried he could soak for a little in the bath before making his way to the Headmasters office.

Grabbing a pair of fresh, but oversized clothes from the wardrobe, he passed through the bathroom door. He had just taken off his night shirt when he caught his reflection in the mirror. In the days since he left his relatives house, his hair had grown to just above his shoulders. He couldn't help but like how it made him look less like, well, less like him... The Harry Potter everyone gaped at in the streets or whispered about behind his back.

Tucking his hair behind his ears, he could clearly see the grief of losing Sirius in the lines of his face. It had lost it's boyish roundness completely. He really didn't want his friends to see him like this. He didn't look healthy, like a boy of sixteen should. He wouldn't be able to stand Hermione mother henning him or Ron's sideways glances. Grief really did change you.

Turning the taps to the bathtub at random, he ended up with a mess of charcoal colored bubbles, but the smell was very pleasantly lavender and chamomile. He allowed himself the luxury of soaking for twenty minutes before rinsing the bubbles from his body.

He dressed quickly, using his wand to dry his hair and transfigured a loose button into a tie for his hair. He threw his Gryffindor robe over his clothes, embarrassed about what he could call his 'best outfit' and made for Dumbledore's office not knowing what to expect.

XxXxXxXx

After reciting the password to the large stone gargoyle that stood sentry at Dumbledore's office, he stepped onto the winding staircase and rode it to the top.

He stopped a few feet from the oak door with the griffin knocker. Last time he was here it did not end well. Summoning his Gryffindor courage he knocked on the door and waited no longer than a second before it was waved open with a soft, 'Come in, Harry.'

"You wanted to see me, Professor?" Harry inquired standing awkwardly just inside the door.

"Yes, my boy. Please, have a seat." Dumbledore gestured to the seat in front of his desk and Harry sat down tentatively on the edge.

"Lemon drop?" Dumbledore offered, extending the tin of yellow candies.

"No sir. Thank you." He had yet to accept one from the Headmaster, when would he stop asking? Harry, hoping to move this meeting along asked, "What was it you wanted to see me about, sir?"

"Ah, yes. You see, there are some things we need to discuss regarding your summer thus far."

"My aunt and uncle you mean?" Harry hedged, not liking where this was going already.

"The very same." Dumbledore interlocked his fingers in front of him and leaned forward slightly. "As you know, there are very powerful blood wards there that are essential to your continued safety. As such, although it pains me to admit, I am hesitant to pursue any legal charges against your Aunt and Uncle, for the time being. When Voldemort is gone, well, then, that will be a different story. entirely"

Dumbledore peered at Harry over his half moon glasses, gauging his reaction. The nervous teen refused to make eye contact and was twisting the hem of his robe in his hands, clearly uncomfortable with the topic of conversation at hand.

"Sir, I don't want to press charges either. I really don't need Rita Skeeter or the ministry mucking about in my business, people talk about me too much as it it. I'd prefer to keep it quiet." Here Harry paused, scared of the answer to the question he was about to ask. "You don't mean to send me back there next year do you?"

"My dear boy, I would wish nothing more than to answer that question with a no. However, as you know, the circumstances are not as simple as all that. The blood protection must be renewed each year. Rest assured we will take every precaution so as we do not have a repeat of this year. You will be safe, Harry. I have your best interests at heart. Trust me on this."

Here Harry snapped his head up, narrowly stifling the snort that threatened to escape him. His eyes briefly met the Professor's and he ripped his gaze away as soon as he felt a tickle behind his eyes. He may not have mastered Occlumency, but he was very well aware of the way it felt by now. He resisted the urge to get up and walk out.

Why would he have expected the Professor to be on his side? No adult ever was. If life had taught him anything, it was that he had no one to rely on but himself. No matter how much Dumbledore professed it was for his own good, Harry knew better. It was for the good of the war effort.

He shook his head and dared to look into the Headmaster's eyes. Not feeling the familiar tingle he hardened his gaze. Well, the sorting hat hadn't tried to put Harry into Slytherin for nothing. Two could play this game.

"Very well, Professor. I agree, I will return to that place once more. I will even act that I believe your doting grandfather act come term. We both know better, your interests are with the war effort. Whether I come out if this alive or dead is of no concern to you, as long as I live long enough to take Tom Riddle with me." Harry leveled the Headmaster with a firm gaze, refusing to break eye contact this time. He had no plan of returning to that house ever again, but the Headmaster didn't need to know that. He had more than enough money in his Gringotts vault to hide away somewhere for the summer and if he studied as much as he knew he should this year, he could ensure his own safety, he had no doubt about that. He need only apply himself as he never had before.

"Harry, I'm sorry that you see me this way. I may not have always done best by you, but I have tried." Dumbledore's head dropped and his shoulders sagged. He seemed truly sorry and at the moment he seemed every bit his age. "I know I have failed you in more ways than one, my boy. I only hope that we can get past this together. I will do my best to keep you involved in decisions regarding yourself going forward. Would that be agreeable to you?"

Harry sighed, softening slightly he replied, "That would be a start, Professor. I know we _are_ working towards a common goal, to rid the world of Voldemort, but I'd prefer to come out of the other side alive. I believe that you want me to as well, but I also believe that you are willing to sacrifice me if need be. I understand that it may come down to that, but I am not yet resigned to it. I need to look out for me, because no one else will."

Dumbledore seemed to consider his words before responding.

"My how you've grown, Harry. Very well, I only hope you will be open to growing our relationship this year. You will return to your relatives, we will heighten security, you will fulfill your part of the prophecy, I will give you every available resource to do so and we will present a united front, regardless of how you presently feel. In the meantime, I do hope I can prove that I care for you. Have I made mistakes? Yes. But which of us can truly say they have nothing to regret in life?" Harry's stomach dropped, his thoughts landing on Sirius.

Dumbledore had been more forthcoming that he had expected. If he started treating Harry as more of an equal and less of a child, they may have a leg to stand on for improving their relationship. His head gave a stiff nod in agreement, shaking off the images of Sirius' face as he fell through the veil.

'I have a few requests now, sir." At Dumbledore's nod Harry continued. "First, lessons with Snape six days a week, was that you idea or his? Because I can promise you that is a recipe for disaster. As much as I need to learn, it would be beneficial if Snape and I didn't tear each other apart before I have the chance."

"Professor Snape, Harry." Dumbledore obligatorily corrected. "And Professor Snape did set the schedule, I advise you take this matter to him. I'm sure he would be open to compromise if you present your case. Ah," Dumbledore popped a lemon drop into his mouth, sucking on it thoughtfully he said, "perhaps I would rephrase your argument though."

Harry raised an eyebrow in a, 'you can't be serious way', as if Snape would ever take into consideration what Harry had to say. All the same, he could tell the subject was closed by that damning twinkle in Dumbledore's eyes. He exhaled, his breath blowing a strand of hair out of his face, that had fallen from his tie.

"Fine." He gritted through clenched teeth. Composing himself he tried again. "I will need my school supplies for this school year I would like to visit Diagon Alley with Ron and Hermione." He needed some sense of normalcy, if Dumbledore turned this down, he'd just have to find his own way.

"I believe that would be unwise given the state of things, I think you know this, Harry. We can always owl order your supplies, it is a wonderful alternative."

"Professor, I need this…" Harry pleaded. It killed him to be so vulnerable to this man, but he needed to get through to him. Dumbledore sighed and leaned back in his chair.

"Harry, believe me, I would like to grant you this, but I have concerns. Precautions would need to be taken to ensure your safety and for that I would need your full cooperation."

"I understand that, sir. But you will run the plan by me before implementing it I trust." Harry raised an eyebrow at the Headmaster.

"I would not dream of doing otherwise." He smiled kindly at Harry.

"Thank you, sir." Harry let some of the hardness fall from his face and gave the Headmaster a small smile in return.

"Now, onto our last order of business." Dumbledore proclaimed. "The matter of Sirius' will." He leveled Harry with a kind look over his half moon glasses. Harry looked down into his lap and began playing with the hem of his robe again, the feelings of Sirius passing still too fresh in his mind.

"Sirius has left you all of his assets including his vault at Gringotts and the estate of 12 Grimmauld Place. With that comes the transference of ownership of you of Kreacher, the house elf. What would you have done with the estate, Harry?"

Harry thought on this. What would he want it for? It was dark and gloomy and his godfather had hated it there. It didn't particularly hold a host of great memories for him either. He had gotten to know his godfather there, yes, but outside of that… he couldn't use it as a hiding place, the whole of the Order knew of it's existence. Harry knew what Sirius would have wanted done with it and he voiced as much.

"It can remain as Headquarters, sir. It's what Sirius would have wanted."

"Thank you very much for that, Harry. I believe you are correct in saying so. As for Kreacher…" The Headmaster waved his hand through the air beside him.

"I don't care what happens to him. For all I care you can mount his head on the wall, it seems to be what he wants anyway. " Harry's stomach roiled at even hearing the elf's name after the part he played in his godfather's death.

"I understand your anger, Harry. However, I imagine Kreacher could still be proven useful. He needs only to be swayed and a bit of kindness goes a long way. If I may suggest?" Here he raised an eyebrow in question and Harry nodded for him to continue. "Send him to work with the house elves in the kitchens here at Hogwarts. They may prove a good example for him and I believe your friend Dobby would be more than happy to keep an eye on him for you."

Harry mulled this over, it certainly couldn't hurt and he would feel more secure with someone watching the traitor elf when he could not. Without preamble Harry stood and called out. "Kreacher! Dobby!"

The resulting summons were almost comical in their polarity. Dobby bowed deeply, pointy nose and wobbling hats nearly touching the ground, with a wide toothy grin on his face. With a shining exclamation of, "What can Dobby be helping, Mr. Harry Potter sirs with today?!"

While Kreacher on the other hand, stood hunched from age in no form of a bow in his torn and dirty pillowcase mumbling under his breath, 'Oh, how Kreacher despises the Potter boy. Standing against the Dark Lord as bold as brass. Filthy half-blooded…" But Kreacher did not get to finish his sentence as Dobby all but jumped him. His mismatched socks flying through the air, whizzing past Harry's face in a blur. Dobby poked Kreacher hard in the chest with a long spindly finger.

"You dare insult Master Harry Potter? He is the greatest, the kindest, the most bravest wizard to ever lives!" Dobby screeched tears pooling in his eyes.

"Dobby!" Harry called grabbing the small elf's attention. To his credit he immediately snapped to and faced Harry at attention. Harry resisted a laugh. "I have a very important job for you, Dobby."

"A very important job for, Dobby? From Mr. Harry Potter, sir? Oh, yes, sir! Dobby is happy to be doing anything to help the great Harry Potter, sir!" Dobby puffed up importantly.

"Thank you, Dobby. And, please, just call me, Harry." Harry immediately regretted this statement as Dobby burst out.

"Oh no! Dobby is honored, sir, but Dobby could never call such a great wizard by first name alone!" He was shaking his head adamantly, great big bat ears hitting himself in the face.

"Uh, fine then." Harry quickly amended. "Dobby, I need you to watch over Kreacher for me. Show him the ropes in the kitchen, make sure he doesn't get into any trouble and most importantly make sure he is not communicating with anyone he should not be." He fixed Kreacher with narrowed eyes.

"Yes, Mr. Harry Potter, sir! Dobby will see to it that it is done!" He puffed out his chest even more than Harry thought should be possible. He looked like a balloon about ready to burst.

"Thank you, Dobby. I'm counting on you." The elf bobbed his head up and down in satisfaction. Harry turned to Kreacher now. His lips curled in disdain "As for you. Kreacher, I hereby forbid you to communicate with anyone but myself unless it is strictly related to your work duties here at Hogwarts. You will work in the kitchen and you will listen and learn from Dobby. You will not cause trouble and you will be an ideal employee to this castle. Am I understood."

"Kreacher understands." The dirty elf said giving a sarcastic bow and sneering all the while.

"Very well. You are both dismissed. Thank you, Dobby." Harry said kindly once more to the jovial elf.

"Yes, of course, Mr. Harry Potter sir. Now, we need to get Kreacher clean. Yous can't be working in the kitchens in such filth. Have you no pride?" And with that the two disappeared with dual _pops._

Harry let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding and dropped heavily back in his chair. It was more than unpleasant having to see the dirty elf again.

"Very well done, Harry. I believe that concludes our business here today. Unless you have anything to add?" the Headmaster asked pointedly.

"No, sir. That's all. I will be waiting to hear of plans for Diagon Alley." Harry stood, brushing the front of his robes.

"Of course. Good day, Harry."

"Good day, Professor." Harry nodded before he turned on his heel and left the brightly lit office.

Harry had no more than made it halfway across the entrance hall when a familiar voice called out to him.

"Harry! Wonder if I might have a word?" Harry turned to face Remus Lupin as he trotted to catch up to him.

"Hi Professor! Of course. Where to?" Harry was excited to see the man. The last true Marauder, Pettigrew had lost that right long ago.

"Have you had lunch yet, Harry?" Harry shook his head no. "Very good. I wonder if you might join me then?"

"Of course, Professor."

"Please, Harry, just call me Remus." He said kindly as he made his way across the hall, Harry trailing behind.

"I don't know, Prof…Remus. It just feels too weird."

"At least try." Remus smiled kindly as they reached the third floor corridor. "Once term resumes you may call me Professor again, deal?" Here Remus turned at the door to his old office. Harry immediately put two and two together.

"You mean?!" A wide grin split his face.

"Yes, Harry. The Board of Governor's have deemed it best to allow me my old position back. I will be your Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher this year." Remus said proudly gesturing Harry inside and over to a small table, usually used for tea service.

"That's great, Professor! Er…Remus."

"I thought you may be pleased." Remus waved his hand and a platter of BLT sandwiches and a large _sauciere of creamy tomato soup popped up on the table. "Please take a seat, eat."_

 _Harry sat down and grabbed half a sandwich and poured himself a small bowl of soup. He was still struggling to get his appetite back, but was determined to put back on the stone and a half he had already lost over the summer._

Remus reached over and poured Harry an icy cup of pumpkin juice from the flagon on the table.

"So, Harry. How are you feeling. All rested up?" Remus inquired politely as he served himself.

Harry grimaced he really didn't want to talk about his feelings. Not now anyway.

"Could we talk about something else, please?" Without waiting for an answer he continued, "How did Dumbledore convince the Board of Governor's to let you teach this year?"

Remus took pity on the boy and without hesitation explained how now that Lucius was imprisoned in Azkaban and not whispering into the Governors' ears it was all to easy. After all, the Governor's did not want a repeat of Umbridge, or Moody…or Lockhart…or Quirrell...for that matter. They figured someone, even if that someone was a werewolf, who had already proven themselves a competent teacher was most practical. Harry nodded, glad that his friend and favorite teacher would be back at Hogwarts this year. No more Defense teacher surprises!

"Harry, I have to ask. What in the world is going on with your hair?!" Remus gestured hand at Harry.

Harry stopped midway to grabbing another sandwich half, he intended to force himself to eat. His hand fell back and he ran his hands through the hair at the nape of his neck.

"Is it that noticeable?"

Remus looked at him in disbelief and chuckled.

"Is it that noticeable, Harry. Why, if I didn't know better I would think that you were wearing a glamor." The table cleared itself in front of them and was replaced with a tea service.

"I don't know what's going on Remus." Harry sighed. "It just keeps getting longer, I don't know when it's going to stop." Harry blushed at the topic he was going to bring up next. He looked out the window trying to act casual. "Is wizarding puberty any different than muggle puberty? That's the only thing I can come up with." Harry turned back to his Professor expectantly as he finished pouring them each a cup of tea.

"It's not unheard of to have drastic changes in puberty as a wizard, but normally by the age of sixteen a wizard has slowed in his changes." Remus added to lumps of sugar to his own tea and stirred. "It seems, however, yours have just recently begun. And any _unusual_ changes, generally have to do with a wizards power and potential making itself known." Remus surveyed the boy in front of him thoughtfully. He had noticed the change in the boys face, but grief did things to people. He himself had quit taking care of himself in the weeks after Sirius' passing and had just recently regained his proper weight. Harry's face had lost it's boyish nature, not entirely unexpected. Harry had always been a bit behind in terms of growth compared to his classmates. Looking back now, he could only reason that it had to do with the malnourishment he suffered at the hands of his _'family.'_

Harry noticed a dark look cross over his Professor's face.

"Er, Profes…Remus, are you alright?" Remus shook his head, banishing the thought from his mind.

"Yes, of course. Forgive me."

"Er, right." Harry stammered unsure of where his Professor's thoughts had wandered. "Leave it to me to be unnatural again. Why can't any thing about me be normal?" Harry banged a fist on the table, causing some soup to splash on to the surface. Remus waved his wand nonchalantly cleaning up the mess.

"Harry, I know it doesn't help, but things will get better. Maybe not immediately, but in time."

"No offense, but I don't see how that is possible, Remus. My whole life has proved otherwise and I'm either to be killed by a megalomaniac, or I have to kill him myself. Neither sounds too pleasant to me. In the meantime, I have _Snape_ , of all people, who's supposed to show me how to do it. That all sounds pretty miserable to me." Harry put his head in his hands. He really hadn't wanted to get into any of this. "Please, Remus, can we change the topic?"

Remus did so flawlessly.

"There was actually a reason I asked you here today, Harry. Besides, of course, to spend some time with you before I left on Order business." Here he hesitated and waited for Harry to look up. "I had something I wanted to ask you, it only felt right after, well…after Sirius." He looked apologetically at Harry, sorry to have to bring up the sore subject at all. At Harry's soft nod of understanding, he continued. "Well, I thought if you were open to it, I'd like to become your guardian in his stead. I understand that your relatives are still in the picture, but I could help you handle your affairs in the wizarding world. And I would do everything in my power to ensure your safety when it comes time to renew the blood protections."

Harry glared at Remus here. "You spoke with Dumbledore already."

"Well, yes… I thought it only appropriate." Remus was chewing on his lower lip in worry. This wasn't going at all how he had hoped.

"No, of course! Nothing can be done without Dumbledore's approval. Nothing can be done without him signing off!" Harry's temper was boiling below the surface, he was angry, but he could also feel some of that familiar foreign anger seeping in as well.

"Harry, I am doing this out of interest for you. I do care for you and I want to help you however I can."

"Then you should have just done it, Professor!" Harry spat at the man in front of him. "You should have just done what you thought was right. Not everything needs to be run through _Dumbledore._ " His scar flared at the mentioned of the name and Harry pressed his palm to it.

"Harry are you all right?" Remus had rushed to his side and knelt in front of him. Trying to remove the hand from his scar to look at it himself.

"No, I'm bloody not alright, _wolf_!" He slammed his palm flat on the table breaking his tea cup in the process. The pain from the porcelain piercing his flesh broke him from the grip of Voldemort's anger and he came back to himself. He saw the hurt look on the professor's face, what had he said? Oh…right…

"Remus." Harry stood cautiously and his Professor followed from his crouched position the look of hurt clear in his eyes. "I'm so…"

"No, you're right, Harry. It was a silly idea. A wolfish whim." He turned his back to Harry and gazed out the window.

"No, it wasn't. Really Remus. I'm sorry! Voldemort he…he's angry right now. Unfortunately, I can't filter out his feelings from mine yet. I'm so sorry Remus, I'm going to work really hard at Occlumency this year so this doesn't happen anymore. Please, please forgive me. I never meant…" Harry hung his head in shame.

Remus shoulders rose and then fell as he took a deep breath and spun around.

"No, of course you didn't mean it, Harry. I know you better than that." He offered a weak smile. "Still, the offer stands if you choose to accept it."

Harry looked down at his worn trainers. It was a generous offer, he didn't deserve it after his outburst. Still, even though some of the anger had been foreign, he meant most of what he said. Why did everything have to be run through Dumbledore. If someone truly wanted him, wouldn't they claim him without regard to his opinion? Harry couldn't completely fault Remus. It seemed as though everyone in the order was firmly in the man's pocket. Well, Snape wasn't afraid to voice his opinion, that much was certain. But Harry didn't care much for Snape's opinions to begin with. Besides, Harry was almost of age now, what did he need a guardian for at this stage? A mentor would be nice, sure, and Remus had always been kind to him, but did he want him as a guardian?

That would mean he would have a say in the decisions he made in life and by extension Dumbledore. Remus would always bend his ear Dumbledore's way and Harry wasn't convinced he would be able to change that if he disagreed with decisions made regarding him. One thing was clear, this was too big of a decision to make rashly.

"Remus, I'm very grateful for the offer, really, I am! It's a big decision though." Harry worried his bottom lip, but then looked Remus directly in the eyes and said confidently, "Could you give me sometime to think about it, please?"

"Of course, Harry. I understand completely." And Remus looked as though he really did, for which Harry was immeasurably pleased. "Now, let's get your hand fixed up shall we?" Remus chirped brightly, smoothly changing the topic again to make Harry more comfortable.

"Right, sorry about your cup, Remus." Harry apologized as Remus attended to his hand.

"We are not wizards for nothing." And with that he picked up his wand and cast a swift _Reparo,_ all the pieces of the cup finding their home. "No harm no, foul." He smiled pleasantly at the muggle phrase as he finished bandaging Harry's hand.

"I'm afraid I'm no Madame Pomfrey, but that should do. Perhaps a visit to her may be in order when you leave."

Harry looked down at the bandaged hand, it still stung, but Harry figured he deserved the pain after what he had said.

"Thanks Remus." Harry smiled up at the familiar face. "Will you have to be gone long?" he asked concerned. Who knew what task he had been assigned, he was almost afraid to ask.

"Sporadically." Remus correctly interpreted the concern on Harry's face. "Don't worry yourself too much. I've not been assigned anything too dangerous. After all, Hogwarts will need their Defense Professor come September 1st." He winked at Harry. "You best be on your way, I can only imagine what Severus has already assigned you for your lessons. I hear they are to start tomorrow?"

Harry just groaned in response, having forgotten all about the assignment he had to complete that night. That was all the answer Remus needed.

"You'll be fine, Harry. And I'll try to check in at least once before term resumes. Now, on your way." He gave Harry a gentle push to the door.

"Bye, Professor and be safe!"

"I'll be back in one piece, Harry, never you worry."

And with one last wave Harry made his way back to his room in the dungeons.

XxXxXxXx

Three hours later Harry found himself laying on the floor in front of his fireplace, he had just finished chapter two in the Occlumency book and he was bored to death already. How he was going to read and summarize three more chapters was beyond him.

He had already made a circuit around the room as he completed the first two chapters. He started at his desk, moved to his window nook halfway through chapter one, was on his bed studying by chapter two, sprawled over the table at the couch halfway through that chapter and now was chewing on the end of his quill as he dreaded the beginning of chapter three.

His hand was hurting from where he had cut it on the cup early that afternoon. As a result, his handwriting was even messier than his usual chicken scratch. He was sure Snape wouldn't miss the opportunity to berate him for that. He thought briefly of visiting Madame Pomfrey, but had no desire to do so. He'd spent enough time in there already, thank you very much.

Harry had resolved to just make the quality of his work that much better to make up for his poor penmanship. He was rapidly regretting that decision. He was interrupted from starting chapter three as the table from earlier popped back into existence, his dinner upon it. Well that was a well timed distraction.

He didn't hesitate leaving his work behind as he bee lined for the table. Mmm, Shepherd's Pie, his favorite. He was determined to eat a good size portion and loaded his dinner roll with butter. He needed the extra calories.

The dishes cleared as soon as Harry finished and he Accio'd his homework to the table, hoping that would stop it from disappearing as well. It worked. It seemed as long as it was in use, it would remain.

Harry grudgingly began the next chapter a headache beginning to form behind his eyes. He removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes. His vision was swimming in and out of focus. How was he ever supposed to complete his assignment if he couldn't even see properly? He placed the glasses back on his face and looked around. Everything was still shifting in and out of focus. Well this was pointless, he thought to himself as he stood and placed his glasses on the nightstand. His eyes were tired and his headache was building. Maybe if he lay down for a bit, but as he made for the bed his stomach lurched.

He sprinted for the bathroom, he made it in the nick of time as the contents of his stomach made their way into the bowl of the toilet. Maybe he had forced himself to eat too much. He splashed cool water on his face after brushing the taste out of his mouth. He would have to slowly up the amount of food he ate and not force it so much. He felt a little better after expunging the contents of his stomach. He decided to give his eyes a break, he had been too focused for too long anyway, surely that was why his eyes were acting as they were.

Harry made to the charmed window in his bedroom and looked out allowing himself a brief respite form his work. Thirty minutes later his eyes had settled back into focus again. He sighed as he turned to gather his belonging from the table and work in the window seat. As soon as he gathered his assignment the table popped back out of existence and Harry finished his work, not even noticing that his glasses still resided on the bedside table.

XxXxXxXxXx

Harry woke early the next day, the sun hadn't yet crept in through the window. Pushing back the warm blue and black tartan flannel sheets he reached for his glasses on the nightstand. He stood up slowly, tripping over his own feet as his vision blurred again. "URGH." He groaned resisting the urge to kick the bed frame in front of him. He removed his glasses furiously rubbing at his eyes. When he opened them, he had perfect vision. What in the world was going on? Harry looked at the glasses in his hand, the glasses he had used for as long as he could remember. More confused than ever, he gingerly placed them back on the night stand.

Harry moved to the bathroom to attend to his morning ministrations and emerged an hour later freshly bathed, hair hanging freely around his face. He ate a quick and more reasonable breakfast than he had forced the day before and not wanting to rile his Professor any more than necessary, resolved to review his summaries once more before handing them in for today's lesson at nine.

XxXxXxXxXx

Harry approached Snape's office anxiety curling in his stomach. Last years lessons had not went well and while he was determined there would not be a repeat of that this year. He was only half of the equation, Snape was the unknown factor. Would he alter his teaching style from last year? If the book he had provided him was any indication, the answer was yes, but Harry wasn't placing any bets. Harry steeled his nerves and knocked twice.

"Enter." Snape's silky and cold voice called from beyond the door.

Harry opened the door cautiously and closed it slowly behind him, standing in front of the door with his hands held behind his back.

"Over here, Potter, sit. I do not have all day." Snape shot at Harry. Harry snapped to attention and quickly seated himself in front of the Potion Master's desk. Snape surveyed Harry over his intertwined fingers as though he were a particularly interesting potion's specimen. Harry was becoming increasingly self conscious of his looks. Snape seemed to decide that whatever it was he was thinking was not worth his time to address for the next moment he spoke.

"Your assignment, Mr. Potter." He held out his hand waiting for Harry to place the parchment in it. Harry obliged quickly. Snape spent the next twenty minutes skimming over Harry's notes, making scathing comments that Harry couldn't quite make out, under his breath. He did not look amused. Harry became increasingly more worried as the Professor read on. He had done his best, truly. He thought it was notches above his usual work. Harry looked down at the cold stone floor, finding a small divet that was worth enough to hold his interest as a distraction until he heard the parchment slapped down onto the desk.

"Tell me, Mr. Potter, did you think I had nothing better to do than decipher these hieroglyphs you call writing? It looks like a toddler wrote this, where are your glasses?"

"I don't seem to need them anymore, sir. I'm not sure why..." Harry faded off.

"I don't know which delusion you are operating under, but by the state of this," Snape waved the parchment in the air aggressively, "you very clearly do need them."

"But sir. I can see fine really, it's my hand you see." And with that Harry held up the hand he had re-bandaged that morning, shaking back the sleeve of his robe so Snape could see.

Snape's hand shot out faster than Harry would have thought possible, grabbing it roughly he pulled it towards him, irritated. Harry had to stand to avoid falling out of his chair. He glared at the man in front of him. Snape removed the bandage more gently than Harry would have though possible.

"And did it not occur to you that a visit to Madame Pomfrey may not be remiss? Or do you not have a brain in that thick skull of yours?"

"It did, _sir_. _"_ Harry ground out trying to pull his hand back, Snape obliged. "I just..."

"You just what, Potter?"

"I didn't want to spend any more time in the hospital wing, I've had enough to last me the rest of my life." Harry resisted screaming at the man in front of him, but just.

"Are you really that dim-witted, Potter? Madame Pomfrey could have mended you in a heart beat. As it is, I have no desire to hear any whinging for our lessons today so I'll make quick work of this." Snape stood quickly and made his way around the desk. "Hand." He demanded holding out his own awaiting Harry's.

Harry hesitated only a moment as he took in the impatience written in every inch of the man's face. Snape pulled his wand out, muttering a strand of Latin that Harry could not hope to follow, he watched in amazement as the cut on his hand stitched together seamlessly. Snape dropped his hand unceremoniously when he was done, as if touching Harry for too long would poison him.

Harry held his hand up to the light and turned it back and forth. He couldn't see a mark on it, it was perfectly unblemished, well, except for the words _I must not tell lies_ , those he would be branded with for the rest of his life.

"Wow, thank you, Professor!" Harry said brightly, too brightly for anyone in the presence of one Severus Snape.

"You can thank me by proving yourself a competent student. On your feet. Prepare yourself."

Harry scrambled to his feet, no way Snape was going to approach this the exact same way as last year. Harry had his answer seconds later as he stood at the end of Snape's wand.

" _Legilimens."_ Snape slipped easily into Harry's mind, dodging in and out of his memories.

 _Harry was six and he didn't understand why he had to stay in his cupboard for Christmas...He was twelve and there was a house elf bouncing on his bed... He was fourteen and his godfather was disappointed he wasn't more like his father... He was fifteen and Umbridge was about to cast the Cruciatus at him, he was writhing on the floor at the Ministry, Voldemort was in his mind..._

"You are not even trying, Potter. _Force me out!"_ Not giving Harry a chance to catch his bearings he shouted. "Legilimens."

 _He was fourteen and the dark mark was floating ominously above his head, Cedric was dead at his feet his blank, dark eyes staring at nothing and everything... He was sixteen and Lupin was asking to become his guardian..._

"How sentimental." Snape sneered, pulling out of his thoughts without effort. "You certainly like to run with dogs, don't you, Potter? It suits you." And with that he was back in to Harry's mind as easily as he had pulled out.

 _He was five and he was drawing with broken crayons, a picture of a loving family, a woman with fiery red hair and a man with long black hair on either side of him..._

Snape was out as soon as he was in. Schooling his expression, he looked at the boy in front of him. No, impossible. But the changes. He shook his head minutely. He had been having dreams lately, odd dreams. Dreams of a life with Lily. A life with Lily he never had the chance to have. She had chosen James and that was the end of it. The betrayal still stung and he swallowed around the bile that threatened to rise at the thought.

He looked at the boy in front of him. He was panting, sweat beading down his face. Perhaps he had pushed him too far. They had made no progress. If the boys writing was any indication he understood the subject matter, so why was it not reflecting in his performance.

"Potter, have you practiced clearing your mind at all since our lessons last year?" He asked exasperated, resisting running a potions stained hand over his face.

The boy hung his head and Snape didn't need to hear the mumbled, "No, sir," to have his answer. Harry had practiced briefly this summer, but he did not think Snape would care with the small amount of effort he had put into it.

"You will resume doing so immediately. Each night before bed you will practice clearing your mind for an hour." Harry opened his mouth to protest and Snape cut him off. "If you are as serious in learning this art as you claim to be you will do as your told." Harry's mouth snapped close and he nodded.

"Dismissed. This was pathetic, Potter. Do spare me the headache tomorrow and practice." The threat was clear in his voice.

"Yes, sir." Harry exited the room as quickly as his legs would carry him. As soon as he was safely ensconced in his own quarters he sunk down against the door. He was pathetic, he knew it. He hadn't put any real effort into practicing and now he was paying for it.

XxXxXxXxXx

Severus Snape strode from his office, robes billowing behind him, he slammed the door to his quarters and made for the corner table with his scotch a top it. He reached for a glass and then hesitated as he picked up the bottle of liquid amber. He couldn't drink, he had Defense lessons with the Potter brat in the afternoon. He set the bottle down roughly and made for the kitchen to make a strong brew of tea instead.

That memory shouldn't have upset him as much as it had, it was a child's drawing after all. But that coupled with his recent dreams and Harry's ever changing looks. Albus may write it off as coming of age and grief, but Severus was not a face value type of man. Something wasn't sitting well with him. As much as he didn't want to dwell on it, his thoughts couldn't help but fall back to his vivid dreams from the night before.

 _It was late and he had just returned from a particularly trying Death Eater's meeting, he banished the tainted robe and mask to the wardrobe in the basement of Prince Manor where Lily would never have to look upon it. No doubt his love, Lily, was asleep in their bed. She always tried to stay awake when he was called away, but often fell asleep a book in her hand. He made his way quietly up the stone stairs of Prince Manor to the large bedroom at the end of the hall. Opening the door to the room, the moonlight from the high windows spilled over the covers and landed on the beautiful witches face._

 _His lovely Lily, he made his way to the side of the bed and maneuvered her latest read from under her arm placing it on the nightstand. Sitting on the side of the bed, he gingerly ran a hand through her brilliant ginger hair. It was soft to touch and smelled of the outdoors. She must have been gardening all day. She had stubbornly been trying to return Prince Manor to it's former glory for months and she loved working in the gardens sans magic. It also had proven a good distraction for her when he was called away._

 _Lily awoke and looked into Severus' eyes, she smiled wistfully at him._

" _What are you looking at, Sev? I can't help that I'm getting fat." She fake scowled at him and laced a hand through his moving it to her pregnant stomach._

" _You? Fat? Never, love." He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead._

The dream world swirled and he was in a room down the hall at Prince Manor, a mid-wife dutifully cleaning the room.

 _A little boy with a mop of dark hair was swaddled in his wife's arms in a light green blanket. Severus stood over her, his hands on her face planting kisses all over it. She giggled, she was exhausted, but happy. Severus looked down at their child._

" _Lux Tenebris Severus Snape." Severus said the words reverently as though they were a lifeline. Lily handed the sleeping bundle to him and he held the child as if he was the world, and to him, he was. The baby began to wake and he blinked open his green eyes staring up at his father. He had his mothers eyes._

Severus shook his head violently, it was utterly impossible. Sure they had briefly been together after they had graduated school, but she broke it off tearfully professing she was still in love with that swine, Potter. What she saw in him, he still had no idea. Severus banished the thoughts to the back of his mind, he would think on it no more. The only reason these dreams were plaguing him, if he could call seeing the love of his life a plague, was his forced proximity of the Potter off spring. Finishing his cup of tea, he resolved to dedicate the rest of his time until he had to see the accursed Potter child again, to brewing potions. As gardening had helped Lily, brewing was Severus' escape.

XxXxXxXxXx

There you have it! I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Ten points to whoever can guess what Harry's legal name means. If you leave what house you are in, we can start our own House Cup.

Reviews, questions, suggestions and comments always welcome and appreciated. See you all soon!

~Bria Snape


	6. Breaking Down Walls

Another long one for you guys, I hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and Co.

Chapter 6: Breaking Down Walls

Harry used his time between lessons to get some fresh air. He had been pent up in the castle all day yesterday working on his assignment and now half of today. When lunch appeared on the table after his Occlumency lesson, he had swiped a sandwich off the top, tucked an apple into his front robe pocket and made for the Entrance Hall doors.

Once outside, he made his way down towards the boathouse intent on laying in a boat and listening to the sounds of the lake. He had forgotten how many stairs there were to the landing. Even if he had wanted to go back up, he would have to rest first. Settling himself comfortably at the bottom of one of the moored boats that were used to whisk first years across the lake, he figured there was no time like the present to practice Occlumency. Besides, there was nothing in his life he wanted to spend any amount of time pondering right now. It was all too complicated and exhausting.

Harry lay in the hard, yet oddly comfortable, wooden boat trying to think of nothing but the water lapping at the sides, listening to the trees blow in the distance and the occasional splash of a frog jumping into the murky water. Thoughts kept bubbling to the surface of his mind and each time he tried to push them back down and think of nothing, but they just didn't want to stay. After twenty minutes of this he sighed, fished the apple from his pocket and thought upon his lessons with Snape.

He had very nearly lost his temper, something he had told himself he wouldn't do, and that was only the first lesson. He had Defense with him in the afternoon from two to four. Snape had been... _decent,_ for lack of a better word, in the beginning. Decent by Snape standards anyway, but the actual lesson had gone worse than he imagined. How was it, that besides giving Harry a book on Occlumency, Snape hadn't altered his teaching methods at all? How was he supposed to learn if never shown how to do what was asked of him, reading could only do so much for a person. As proven by Hermione and her flying proficiency, or lack there of.

And what was with him ending his last Legilimens so quickly after seeing the drawing his five year old self did? That was stranger than anything else Snape had done. He could have sworn he saw a flicker of confusion pass across his stoic face in that moment. It was just a picture a lonely little boy had made with pilfered crayons. Sure, maybe the man looked a bit like Snape, long hair and all, but that's where the resemblance ended. It was only a stick figure drawing after all, nothing about it should upset a grown man. Unless Snape had some deep-rooted fear of stick figures he didn't know about. Harry snorted at the thought. If only, then he would have some leverage against Severus Snape.

Harry yawned and rolled over on to his side, the sun shining down on him making him tired. It couldn't hurt to rest before his Defense lessons, it might even do him some good. Occlumency was exhausting, both mentally and physically. With another yawn, Harry drifted into a peaceful slumber aided by the gentle rocking of the boat.

XxXxXxXxXx

Harry woke feeling relaxed and quite pleased a while later as he squinted up at the sun overhead and rolled over. He stretched, twisting his neck this way and that as he worked out the kinks from sleeping at the bottom of a wooden boat. As he regained his wits he reached for his wand in his pocket and cast a quick T _empus_. Seeing the time he nearly fell into the water as he scrambled onto the dock. One fifty! He was going to be late for lessons with Snape if he didn't hurry.

Harry sprinted for the stairs, having to stop half way up to regain his breath. He skidded through the Entrance Hall as he struggled to make the sharp turn into the dungeons. He burst through Snape's door without even thinking to knock. Completely out of breath, he doubled over just inside, one hand on his knee, the other over the stitch in his side.

"You're late." Snape bit out looking at the small silver clock that adorned his desk. Snape couldn't help but let out a breath of frustration at the boy in front of him. "Sit down, before you fall down, Potter."

Harry obliged, falling to his knees where he had previously been bent over, unable to hold himself up any longer.

"You idiot child. How do you expect me to teach you in this state?" Snape came to hover over Harry arms crossed in front of him.

"I just need...a minute...Professor..." Harry huffed out between breaths.

"Get out, Potter! Come back when you are ready to learn. I have no patience for such antics. I am putting vast amounts of time aside for your benefit and thus far I am not impressed." Snape crossed to the door, wrenched it open and gestured for Harry to exit.

"Please, sir. I am ready. I need to learn this. I promise it won't happen again, I fell asleep in a boat down by the boathouse."

Snape raised an eyebrow sardonically, how on earth does one fall asleep in a wooden boat? Although Severus would never admit it to the boy, he knew the toll learning Occlumency took on one as he had admitted to himself earlier that day. Perhaps, only perhaps, he had been a little harsh for a first lesson after a summer out of practice. What was he saying, Potter had a whole summer _to_ practice and did not, if anything he had been too lenient.

"On your feet, Potter. Quick!"

Harry hastened to obey, getting to his feet with no little amount of effort.

"Follow." With that, Snape proceeded out the door not waiting to see if Harry was following. Harry nearly ran after the man trying to catch up, holding the stitch in his side. Snape turned around the next corridor and pushed open a door to the right.

"In."

"Er, sir. Where are we?" Harry looked around. The room was large and empty with stone floors and stone walls. The only fixture in the room, a fireplace large enough for Harry to stand in, a fire blazoned in it's hearth warming the room just enough to not cause a chill.

"As I do not trust you not to destroy my office with your foolish wand waving, we will be holding your practical training in here. Going forward you will meet me here for Defense lessons. Now, I first need to gauge your current, _competency_." Snape uttered the last word with a sneer, as though it were impossible for Harry to be competent in anything. "Draw your wand."

Harry reached to pull his wand from the pocket of his robe at the same time Snape flexed his wrist and his wand shot into his hand.

"Cool trick, sir!"Harry exclaimed before he thought of how inane that would sound to the Professor.

"I assure you, Potter, that was no trick." Snape uttered sarcastically. Leave it to the boy to think practicality was nothing but a 'cool trick.' "You will invest in a good wand holster yourself, preferably spring loaded. If you hope to have any chance of a good defense you may want to make sure you can actually access your wand quickly. You waste valuable time searching through pockets."

Harry nodded. In his awe at Snape's maneuver he had ceased even trying to get his wand out of his robes. He added the holster to his list of things to buy when he visited Diagon Alley with his friends.

"Now, take your stance. I shall first test your shields." And for the second time that day, Harry faced the end of Snape's wand.

For the next ten minutes, Snape fired jinxes, hexes and curses at Harry as he continued to throw shield after shield. Finally, his shield broke under a particularly potent blasting hex, knocking Harry back on his bum. He had expected the fall to hurt more, but as he felt around, the floor seemed to be protected by some sort of cushioning charm. He smiled to himself, well that was sure to help. He knew being blasted to the ground by Snape would not be a one time occurrence. In fact, he wouldn't be surprised if Snape took some sort of sick pleasure in it.

"On your feet, Potter. That wasn't as dreadful as I may have come to expect from your usual performance." Snape allowed. Quickly covering up the near compliment with,"However, we have much work to do. You can't rely on Protego for every curse that comes your way. Only a fool would have one spell for defense in their arsenal."

"Next, we will gauge your offensive prowess. You will attempt to strike or disarm me in any such form."

Harry couldn't resist his face splitting into a grin. He got to curse Snape? Had Christmas come early? Surely it was too good to be true.

"Wipe that smirk from your impudent face before I hex it off!" Snape growled, correctly interpreting Harry's train of thought. "If you think you can actually hit me you are more fool than I thought."

Harry's face fell, if Snape wanted to give him more fuel for him to channel, that was fine with him. At Snape's impatient nod to begin, Harry threw out every curse he could think of at the slimy git. Becoming more and more angry as Snape dodged and blocked each one as though it were nothing more than an annoying fly invading his air space. After twenty minutes of this, Harry was reaching his limit and Snape sensing it, threw a stinking jinx at the boy hitting him squarely in his chest.

"Hey! No fair! I'm supposed to be hexing you." Harry yelled in outrage rubbing at his chest.

"Oh, do quiet down. Do you think any Death Eater or the Dark Lord's going to care about fair? Do you imagine that you will trade spells and take turns like children in the park? If you can't block yourself from a simple stinging jinx then perhaps we shall just quit now."

"But you gave me no warning, I thought you were gauging my skills."

Snape couldn't help but let out a snort of derision.

"Skills? What skills are you referring to, Potter? You couldn't down a pygmy puff with that display. You allow your anger to fuel you and when you do so you are all to easy to bait. You are distracted and weak. You will never improve if you can't learn to _focus your mind_."

"I am not weak! This is Defense, not Occlumency. I just have to be stronger than my opponent." Even as the words escaped Harry's lips, he knew that wasn't true. He wasn't that naive, but why did he always come off that way when goaded by the man standing in front of him.

"Your incompetence never ceases to amaze me. If you cannot control your emotions you will never be able to best your opponent. Having control of your mind will only aide you in your fights, when you are in control of your mind and keep your emotions in check it leaves you open to become that much more aware of your opponents and your surroundings. Honestly, Potter. Should we even continue with these lessons if that is what you think?"

Harry hung his head, kicking himself. How was he to prove that he was ready to learn if he couldn't stop himself from being every bit the idiot Snape proclaimed him to be when he opened his mouth?

"I do know better, Professor. I will work hard, I promise. Just, can we maybe do without all the insults?" Harry hung his head and scuffed his feet on the stone floor, sweat was beading down his face and his mouth was like sandpaper.

"You are making an awful lot of promises, Potter. I would advise you not to make any that you do not intend to keep." Snape didn't deign to answer the second part of the boy's question. A Snape who did not insult a Potter was no Snape at all. "Now, you have five minutes to compose yourself and we will resume with a practice duel."

Snape waved his hand and a flagon of iced water and a glass cup appeared on a small, round table in the corner. Harry didn't need to be told twice, he made for the table to savor his five Snape free minutes.

XxXxXxXx

An hour and a half later Harry walked, more like limped, down the hall to his quarters. When Snape had said _practice duel_ , what he actually had meant was 'run Harry into the ground until he had no breath left in him to protest. Harry was sore and aching and regardless of the cushioning charms on the floor, and as he later found out, the walls, he was sore from more stinging jinxes and Flipendos than he could count.

And Snape called that productive? What was the old bat trying to prove anyway? Harry knew the man was the stronger wizard, how was he supposed to learn if all he did was throw curse after curse at him. As he took his worn trainers off in the entryway, he turned to look at the schedule hanging on the back of the door, holding one arm out to hold himself away from the door. He noticed an update to the _Daily Tasks_. Apparently, he was to read and summarize chapters six through eight in his Occlumency text.

Leave it to Snape to assign homework without even telling him about it. No doubt if he showed up tomorrow without it completed Snape wouldn't hesitate to lament about what a lazy, good for nothing clone of his father he was. Harry sighed and pushed himself away from the door with effort. First thing was first. Harry needed to soak his aching muscles.

XxXxXxXx

Harry soaked in pink bubbles that smelled sickeningly sweet, not being able to replicate his mess of lavender and chamomile bubbles, he mulled over how his first Defense lesson had really went.

Really, it could have been worse. He had come to expect the taunts and criticism Snape threw at him, but if he looked around it, he had offered solid advice. Harry just needed to learn to filter through the sarcastic comments in the moment and not react. Snape was Snape. He was too set in his ways, and Harry should have known that it would have to be him that would need to change for this to work. And he needed this to work.

Snape was right about his temper though. He needed to learn how to control it, he needed to be more in control of his mind and it all pointed back to Occlumency. Ugh, Occlumency. The current bane of his existence, besides Voldemort of course and, well, he supposed he could add Snape to that list as well. Even if he was trying to help him, in his own way…

By the time he got out of the bath and ate dinner it was approaching six o'clock. He resigned himself to spending the rest of the night working on the next three chapters in his text. At this rate he'd have the massive tome finished before school resumed, which was no doubt what Snape had intended. He sprawled out on his bed, books and parchments in front of him and began the cloying task.

XxXxXxXx

Snape sat down heavily in his leather wing-backed chair in front of the fire. His lessons were over for the day and he was indulging in a couple fingers of his finest scotch. Potter's spawn was exhausting. Thank whatever deity that existed that he wasn't his. Severus was a resilient man, but he didn't think could have survived sixteen years of Potter's impudence.

The lesson could have gone worse, certainly, but he wouldn't count it as a success either. While he would never admit it to the boy he _was_ leaps and bounds beyond his fellow year mates. Nonetheless, he had a long way to go if he was every to have a chance against the Dark Lord and live to tell the tale.

Severus had made a promise to Lily's memory and because of her, he would see it through. He would do his best to guide this boy, however difficult it may prove to be, through to the end of this, preferably alive. Why Albus put as much stock as he did in the old broads prophecy he would never know. Potter was still a child, however impudent and intolerable he may be and no child deserved the weight of the world on their shoulders, however annoying they were.

XxXxXxXx

The rest of the week passed in much the same fashion. Snape and Harry had even fallen in to a routine of sorts. Harry would hand in his parchment with his chapter summaries, Snape would review them making scathing remarks under his breath, Harry would endeavor to ignore them and then Snape would spend the next one to two hours plunging through the recesses of Harry's mind. He would never mention what he expected read for the next day, but without fail it was on the charmed parchment in Harry's quarters when he returned to them. Harry was exhausted, but he continued to push himself harder than he ever had before. It felt at though all his spare time was spent on studying. He had even taken to morning jogs to try to boost his stamina.

As well as Harry was grasping the defense concepts, he had yet to show any real progress in Occlumency. If Harry was frustrated by this it appeared to be nothing to Snape's frustration. It all came to a head on his last Occlumency lesson of the week.

Harry leaned patiently against the wall outside the Potion Masters office, hands in pockets. Snape had not answered when he knocked and Harry figured the safest course of action would be to wait for the git to turn up. As tempted as he was to turn around and head back to the comfort of his rooms, he resisted the urge. It was his last Occlumency lesson of the week and he was looking forward to a good lay in tomorrow.

When Snape finally arrived he seemed in a foul mood. Well, Snape was always in a foul mood, but this was off the charts. One look at the professor and Harry knew it was not going to be a pleasant lesson for either of them. Snape swept past Harry, completely ignoring him and entered his office. The only indication that he did see Harry, was the door to the office not being slammed in his face. Snape continued to his desk and snapped at Harry who was lingering in the doorway unsure.

"Well, what are you waiting for? An invitation, Potter?"

Harry scrambled though the threshold and slowly lowered himself into the chair in front of Snape's desk, afraid if he moved too quickly Snape would lash out like a viper. Was it just him or was the chair harder and more uncomfortable than usual. No. Maybe it was just the chilling look fixed upon the stern man's face. At a raised eyebrow, Harry recovered himself and quickly slid his chapter summaries across the desk.

The man made no comment but as his eyes scanned the final line he stood, dropped the parchment in the waste bin and casually cast a wandless _Incendio_ as if he were doing nothing more than lighting a candle _._ Harry's jaw hit the floor, he had spent hours on those the night before. He was about to say as much, but when he turned to rise from his chair the Professor's wand was in his face, a Legilimens on his tongue.

 _He was four and he had just dodged a frying pan as he asked his Aunt what his parents names were...He was seven and he was curled on the cot in his cupboard stomach rumbling with hunger... He was twelve and he lay in the Chamber of Secrets, clutching his arm as venom burned through his veins._

Snape was maliciously raiding Harry's mind, as much as he tried to push the Professor out, he couldn't. The man wasn't filtering his anger at all. For all his talk of controlling your mind and not allowing anger to affect you, Snape was clearly unhinged. He continued to dive through Harry's mind without regard for the boy gripping the arms of the chair he sat in as sweat beaded down his face.

 _He was eleven and his hands were burning the flesh from Quirrell's person...He was nine and his head was thrust against the wall for burning the eggs...He was ten and he was cradling a broken wrist to his stomach, tears streaming down his face..._

"Get...out..." Harry managed to grit out, a headache was raging behind his eyes, he didn't know how much longer he could withstand the attack. He tried to recollect anything useful to push the cold man out of his head, but all of his thoughts were scrambled, he barely registered the chair beneath him.

The onslaught continued and Snape was combing through the memories more slowly, holding on to particularly painful ones and Harry had no choice but to witness his worst memories in slow motion. Ones he had tried to suppress for too long.

 _A beam of green light arched towards the unsuspecting Hufflepuff, he had no chance to defend himself as the light struck him in the chest. The light instantly left his eyes, his face falling slack_ _as the life left his face. His body fell in slow motion, bouncing twice before coming to rest at Harry's feet eyes staring at everything and nothing._

"Stop it! Stop! Stop it!" Harry screamed, he couldn't pull his face away, not with Snape that deep in his mind. The assault continued. Harry knew what would be next.

 _Spells flew erratically across the stone room, a red jet of light just missed his godfather as he ducked around it. He goaded the dark witch and her next spell did not miss. The laughter had not yet died from his handsome, but haunted face as he drifted gracefully back through the veil, dead..._

"Nooooo! Sirius!" Harry screamed falling out of the chair to his knees, eyes retaining their connection with Snape. Tears were streaming down his face and he instinctively pulled his wand, pointed it at Snape and bellowed a spell he had been taught only the day prior, " _Protego Maxima."_

And just like that he was tearing through the Professor's mind. He shot past a blur of images, ripping through the core of the Professor's childhood. He was still screaming as he broke through what looked like a crumbing brick wall and then images were flashing through his mind. He wasn't sure how to slow himself.

 _A pretty red haired witch with emerald green eyes was up on tip-toe's trying to place a kiss...she was across from him at a table at a cafe smiling over her cup of tea, a blush gracing her features...she was bent over in the garden pulling weeds stubbornly...she was running into the mans arms tears running down her face as he limped into the garden...she was laying in bed, a kiss being placed on her forehead by the one that loved her..._

"ENOUGH!" Snape bellowed forcing the pale-faced teen out of his head. He was shaking and memories that he had no recollection of were now clouding his vision. He couldn't see straight and a headache the likes of which he had never had was threatening to split his head open. He had allowed Harry into his mind for far too long, but he hadn't been able to force him out as whatever that was in his mind, broke. He was a master Occlumens and that was enough to cause him worry. He needed to get back to his quarters and fast.

"Professor...What was all that...That was my mum, why was she? Why was she with you..." Harry was worn and weak, he couldn't put a coherent thought together, but he needed answers. "If this is some sick joke you're playing..."

"Dismissed." Snape managed to force out.

"Professor, that was my mum! I have a right to know!" Harry protested, with as much grit as he could muster.

"You have the right to nothing, Potter. Now get out." And without further ado, Snape grabbed Harry roughly by the collar of his robes and threw him into the hallway where he fell rather hard against the ground. The door was slammed in his face before he could regain his footing. Once he staggered his way to his feet, ignoring the pain pulsing through his frame, he began pounding on the Professor's door.

XxXxXxXx

Snape ignored the incessant pounding that was coming from the other side of the door, with any luck the brat would pass out from exhaustion. For now, he needed to make it to his quarters and quick. He could barely see straight, and walking seemed a near impossible feat at the moment.

Summoning a headache draught from his cupboard, he downed the vile tasting liquid and threw the phial negligently against the wall where it shattered into thousands of glass shards.

He stood abruptly, too abruptly. He faltered as he gained his footing and made for the secret passage that would take him from his office to his quarters, bypassing the holy terror awaiting him in the corridor. What would normally be a quick jaunt from one place to the next, took Snape near twenty minutes as the headache continued to build behind his eyes, the draught seemingly worthless. The last two hundred feet to his rooms had Severus feeling his way along the walls, his vision failing him with the splitting headache that continued to build.

He tripped over the step up to his sitting room and just managed to remain upright. He felt along until he collapsed in his favorite leather chair by the fire. Images were assaulting his person and he could hold them off no longer...

" _Lily!_ " _Severus called from across the snow covered street. He had just run out of the Leaky Cauldron as he saw the beautiful red haired witch cross in front of the dark window at the front of the pub._

 _She looked around and smiled softly to herself when she saw her childhood friend. As he approached her, she quickly schooled her face into a light scowl._

" _Lily, please, listen to me." He pleaded and when she made no motion to do otherwise he continued. "Could we go somewhere? Less public?" He hedged._

 _The lithe witch grabbed his wrist and dragged him down a side street to an empty muggle cafe. Once they were seated she prompted._

" _You wanted to speak with me, Sev, so speak."_

 _Severus smiled to himself at the familiar moniker she still addressed him with._

" _Lily, please. I never got the chance to explain." Severus leaned across the table, whispering as though the walls had ears and for all he knew, they did. "I didn't take the Dark Mark to serve the Dark Lord. Albus came to me and wanted me to bring him information that may end his reign. Now that Ainsley is dead, he was in need of a spy and I was perfectly positioned to take up that role. Lucius has been trying to recruit me for months and between my gift of Occlumency, which Albus is helping me hone, and my potions mast..."_

" _Sev stop." Lily laid a hand over his gently,"I already know."_

 _"You do?" Severus' eyes widened in shock._

" _Yes, I just came from Headquarters and ran into Albus, who was only too happy to tell me of his latest_ acquisition. _" She curled a lip slightly at the word. "Sev, I was coming to find you. I'm so sorry I jumped to conclusions when I saw it. I should have known..." She trailed off looking over her cup of tea a blush gracing her face._

 _After night had fallen and agreeing that it was no longer safe for them to meet publicly they planned on meeting at Prince Manor the following weekend. As Snape was about to disapparate in an abandoned alley, Lily surprised him by standing up on tip-toe and placing a warm kiss on the cold man's cheek. With a wink at him, she spun on her heel and was gone with a soft pop._

 _~x~_

 _Severus apparated just inside the edge of Prince Manor's property line, the wards keyed to his magical signature. He banished his Death Eater robes and mask to the basement. Lily had taken to showing up at the Manor every time he was summoned to the Dark Lord's side. Since the day she arrived at the Manor to find Severus collapsed just inside the wards, blood soaking his robes she had insisted on being notified every time he was summoned and he had obliged her. Severus had gifted her a necklace made of a delicate but resilient silver chain, a circular glass charm dangled at the end, forget-me-nots from the Manor's garden pressed and preserved inside. Anytime he was called away, the necklace was charmed to grow warn against Lily's skin, it rested next to her heart and she cherished it._

 _He made his way up the pea stone path to his home, the Dark Lord had not been happy at his delayed response, but Albus would not release him from the Order meeting and Severus had paid the price. As he reached the hedge garden, he turned and leaned against the manicured bush that made an arched doorway into the garden. Amongst the fox glove, iris' and meadow rue was Lily, bent over and pulling at the stubborn weeds. They were almost as stubborn as she was, but ultimately she won out._

 _Snape limped into the garden making his way over to his best friend, as she heard his uneven footsteps approaching she stood and ran into Severus' open arms, tears running down her face, knocking him to the ground._

" _Oh, Sev! I'm so sorry. How careless of me. You were just gone so long and I..." She moved to roll off of him, but he grabbed her firmly around the waist, staring into her eyes. How could this intelligent, fiery woman care for him so much. He was surly and crude and was not deserving of such affection. He moved his hands from her waist to cup her face and wiped her tears with his thumbs. She was searching his face her brow furrowing one moment and in the next a brilliant smile broke out on her face and she kissed him deeply._

 _~x~_

 _Severus stood under the hundreds year old willow tree, he could not help the smile that broke out over his face, even if he had wanted to. Lily, his Lily was walking towards him through the field of oxeye daisies, eyes only for him. She was in a beautiful, form fitted, white lace wedding dress. Elegant buttons down the length of her back and those same daisies from the field thoughtfully placed in the elegant braid that splayed over her shoulder, her forget-me-not necklace next to her heart as always. There was no music, only the babbling of the small lake to her right and the sounds of crickets coming out for the night as the sun began to set. It was a small ceremony, so small in fact that it was only the two intended and a muggle priest. They knew it would not be safe to register this marriage with the Ministry just yet._

 _As Lily made her way to Severus, he could not help but come out to meet her, holding her gently by the hand as they made their way down the remainder of the aisle together. There the priest smiled at the two and began the ceremony. As they said their vows simultaneously, hands intertwined, their voices melded together and were carried on the wind._

 _"We swear by peace and love to stand._  
 _Heart to heart and hand to hand._  
 _Mark, O Spirit, and hear us now,_  
 _Confirming this our Sacred Vow._  
 _You are the star of each night,_

 _You are the brightness of every morning,  
No evil shall befall you, on hill nor bank,  
In field or valley, on mountain or in glen.  
Neither above, nor below, neither in sea,  
Nor on shore, in skies above,  
Nor in the depths.  
You are the kernel of my heart,  
You are the face of my sun,  
You are the harp of my music,  
You are the crown of my company. _

_Always..."_

 _~x~_

 _Severus was crouched outside the Hogs Head Inn, listening in to the interview between Albus Dumbledore and Professor Trelawney, at Voldemort's order. Albus was of course aware of this and had scheduled Severus' own interview for Potions Master right after, giving him good cause to be there. Unfortunately, it appeared this news was not relayed to Albus' impatient brother, who attempted to force Severus from his establishment. Before things had escalated, Albus intervened._

" _Ah, Severus! I see you have arrived early for your interview. If you wouldn't mind waiting inside I will be with you momentarily."_

 _Severus scowled at the man who still had his fists wrapped tightly in his cloak. He so resembled Albus, yet not at the same time, their demeanor's polar opposites._

" _I caught him sneaking about, Albus, this one's no good I'm telling you."_

" _That's all very well, Aberforth. I shall speak to him. Now, if you would please release my Potion's Master candidate."_

 _With a last scowl at the man that was Severus Snape, Aberforth released him, harder than necessary and Severus stumbled. Brushing off his robes and stepping inside he sat at a table in the corner that Albus ushered him to as he bid farewell to Sybill Trelawney._

" _Thank you for meeting me here, Severus. I wonder if you would mind accompanying me to the school for a more practical interview. As you are pining to be my Potions Master, I thought you could demonstrate your skills to me." Here Albus gave him a meaningful look. That was not the original plan, Albus had something on his mind, most likely that 'Prophecy' the old fraud had given just moments ago._

" _Of course, Headmaster." Severus nodded respectfully and then followed Albus to the floo. He shot an irritated look at the man's back for any onlookers, he would not be surprised if Voldemort had others watching the pub. And really, he was irritated. He was in NO way pining for the job, which Albus very well knew. More like Voldemort was pining for Severus to get the job so he could have a conveniently placed spy at Hogwarts._

 _As they stepped out of the floo, Albus gestured for Severus to have a seat. Not wasting any time for once he spoke._

" _I take it you heard the prophecy dear Sybill has spoken this day, Severus?"_

" _A portion of it, before your brother man-handled me." He spat with a scowl. "But, Albus, you can't honestly think that true. Her interview was going poorly and she simply spouted some nonsense to try and save it."_

" _I wouldn't be so sure. She did not have any recollection of what she had said immediately after. She may not have the same gift as her great-great grandmother, however, I think it wise to keep her near." Albus gazed at Severus pensively over his long and gnarled hands._

" _You are awarding a woman, of no true talent I might add, the position of Divination Professor? You know my thoughts on the subject as is, but a centaur would be better suited for the position with all their spoutings about the stars."_

" _Perhaps you are right, but I think it best we do not take the chance of someone else getting their hands on Sybill Trelawney."_

 _There was no arguing with the man and Severus knew it. Seeing the resignation on Severus' face, Albus continued._

" _Which brings us to our next subject. The prophecy, or partial prophecy, you just overheard. There have been far too many raids lately by Tom and his followers, I think this would be a perfect distraction for him. You may not place much stock in prophecy, Severus, but I believe the Dark Lord will and it could prove useful to us. He's always been of a superstitious nature."_

" _Headmaster, if I may, what was the full prophecy?" Severus inquired hopefully, trying not to look to eager._

" _Ah, I think we shall save that for another time, dear boy. The less you know the better. You are progressing magnanimously with your Occlumency, but this it too important to leave to chance."_

" _So, you wish me to relay the portion of the prophecy that I heard, that a child will be born at the end of July that may be able to vanquish him? Headmaster, by doing so we are giving leave for a manhunt, no a child hunt. An innocent child could die for this, I don't know if I can do this."_

" _And here is where you must trust me , my boy. I alone know the full contents of the prophecy, the child will not be harmed." Albus gazed serenely at the man in front of him, confidence exuding from his every pore._

" _How can you be certain? The Dark Lord is to mark him. In order to do so, would harm not have to come to the child?" Severus was suspicious to say the least. Here Albus stood from his desk, making his considerable stature known._

" _Severus, you agreed to become spy for the Order, in that agreement you gave your consent that you would trust me in the war effort. If you cannot fulfill your end of the bargain than I am afraid I may have to deny you the position of Potions Master and, by extension, your safety here. I advise you to consider your options wisely. As much stock as you put in Divination, I am surprised you are refusing at all, or am I to believe you a sudden believer of the arts? All we need to do is provide a distraction while we come up with the means to defeat Tom Riddle. Do I have your cooperation, Severus?" Albus was now leaning against the front of his desk, looking at Severus Snape over his half moon glasses, the twinkle gone from his eyes and a hardened war veterans stare in it's place._

 _Of course he wasn't a believer in such arts as a whole, but that wasn't to say a talented witch or wizard hadn't come along every few generations who had a special gift. Sybill Trelawney, however, was not one of them. She was simply a fraud that was trying to ride the coat tails of her great-great grandmothers gift. She was also a woman in desperate need of a job, if her drab appearance was anything to go by. Severus felt a weight drop in his stomach as he decided it would be best to trust Albus. After all, he had already defeated one dark wizard, who was he, the soldier, to question the Field Marshalls decisions?_

" _As you wish, Headmaster." Severus hung his head and a heavy sigh escaped his lips. Something just didn't feel right, but the Headmaster was much older and much wiser than himself and if he thought this best, so be it._

" _Very good!" That damn twinkle was back in his eyes again, Severus was beginning to hate that twinkle very much. "Now, I believe we have been ensconced in my office for a sufficient amount of time to count as an interview. You best be on your way. Good luck, Severus."_

 _Severus stood bowing slightly to the Headmaster and then turned on his heel and made to the apparition line outside Hogwarts gate, dreading the company he was next to keep._

 _~x~_

 _Severus had just arrived back to Prince Manor, soaked from the late Autumn rain. He hung his travel cloak near the fire in the entryway and proceeded to the kitchen to get a nice steaming cuppa to ease the chill that had settled deep in his bones. The chill from both the rain and the company he had just vacated. Voldemort had been most pleased with Severus at the news he brought. Why people put stock in such things Severus would never know, but if it saved more innocent lives, so be it._

" _Lily, love." Severus started as he rounded into the kitchen. "I thought you were having lunch with Molly."_

" _I was Sev, I just... I wasn't feeling well."_

 _Severus rounded the table and kneeled down in front of her reaching for her hands._

" _What's wrong?" He asked, concern etched on his face._

 _Lily extracted one of her hands and placed it over her stomach as she looked up at the man in front of her, a smile on her face._

" _Nothing at all. I'm pregnant, Sev. We're going to have a child!"_

 _Severus was shocked, he schooled his face quickly, but not quick enough._

" _Sev, what is it?" Lily asked, seeing the distant look in her husband's eyes._

" _How far along?" He asked soberly._

" _About seven weeks I suppose. It looks like we'll be have a summer baby! I know you would have preferred Spring, but this way we'll always get to celebrate together when..." She trailed off, noticing Severus was not listening at all. "You're scaring me, Sev. What's wrong?"_

 _There was no way. No...He did not put much stock in prophecy, but could it really be this much of a coincidence. He couldn't take the chance. If there was any chance their child could be in danger. Lily had the right to know. That same rock from the Headmaster's office settled into his gut once more. Grasping her hands in his and looking into her eyes that had been so full of happiness just moments before he uttered,"Lily, we need to talk..."_

 _~x~_

 _Severus strode up the long gray paver stone path to the Potter Family house, it's resemblance to a miniature Buckingham Palace both sickening and audacious to him. He was there to do the last thing he ever wanted to do, ask James Potter for help. Lily was now three months pregnant and beginning to show, they needed a cover and quick. It would be too dangerous for both Lily, himself and their future child to be found out by the Dark Lord, prophecy or no. Severus was nearly turned away at the door, but at the mention of Lily, he had Potter's attention._

" _You have ten minutes, Snape, speak." James led him to a long oak bench beside a pond with swans floating along the edge._

" _You know I would not be here if I had any other choice, but I come for Lily." He hesitated, not sure how to continue._

" _Lily? What do you have to do with her?" James asked skeptically raising both eyebrows at the man next to him, ruffling his hair in that irritating manner he always had._

" _We are married, Potter. So I would say she has a lot to do with me!" Severus bit out._

 _This had not been the answer James had been expecting, clearly, because he burst out laughing._

" _What sort of delusion is this? Did you mix a bad potion or get hit with a befuddlement charm? Clearly, that's the only explanation here, Snape."_

 _One moment he was clutching his sides laughing and in the next he was sobered, shock displayed clearly on his face as the air shimmered next to Severus and there stood Lily._

" _Shame on you, James Potter! It's true and I'll fire a Reducto at the next person who dares laugh at it." She settled on the bench in between the two men and reached for Severus' hand, running her thumb over his obsidian wedding band, a single emerald, picked to match the exact color of her eyes, in the center._

" _Lil! What are you doing here?" James nearly fell off the bench when she had canceled her disillusionment spell._

" _I knew Sev was going to come, but I wanted to be here too. It's too important to ask you to do this on your own, Sev." She smiled affectionately at him._

" _What on earth is going on here?" James eyes flitted to her stomach as she adjusted her deep blue robes around her. "Lil are you?"_

" _Yes, and that is why we are here. We need your help James Potter." She gave extra emphasis on the we." You were the closest friend that I could think of, the one I could trust the most." Her eyes flitted to Severus, knowing he was not pleased with the arrangement they would be asking for, but she delved on. "As you can see I am starting to show, I can't hope to keep this baby hidden forever, nor would I want to. We can't raise a child within the confines of the Manor and nothing else. Our child will need to be with other people, socialized and I can't do that as Severus' wife. It's to dangerous, you know the task that is assigned to him, we can't risk compromising his position, it's too valuable to the war effort. Like it or not, the information Sev provides is the best chance we have at defeating Voldemort."_

" _Lil, I know he_ says _he's not a Death Eater, but come on!" He leaned in closer to her and spoke barely above a whisper."You don't really believe that do you? I mean just look at the guy, he has connections with all the wrong people and he's always liked the dark arts a bit too much."_

" _Little magic is actual considered dark, Potter, there are dark wizards and those who use it as such. I see seven years of a Hogwarts educations wasn't wasted on you." Severus scoffed sarcastically, Potter had no idea how to be subtle._

 _Jame was on his feet in an instant._

" _Now see here, Snivellus! You don't come to my home, ask for my help, then..."_

 _"BOYS! There's no time for this childish banter! James I come here asking you a large favor. For the love you once bore me and still do as a friend. Marry me!"_

 _Severus heart wrenched as the words left Lily's mouth and James' jaw hit the floor... Severus sneered at the simple man in front of him. What a perfectly Gryffindor reaction._

" _You know I'd do anything for you, Lil, but help me to understand what's going on here."_

" _James, Sev and I were married about a year and a half after we completed school we're only legally married in the muggle world though. If you marry me in the wizarding world we can try to give our son a normal life. With two fathers perhaps, but as normal as it can be until the world is rid of Voldemort once and for all. It will be dangerous, mind you. But there's something else..." Lily chewed on her lower lip, finding it hard to come up with the words. Severus intervened._

" _There is a prophecy, Potter..."_

 _~x~_

 _A little boy with a mop of dark hair was swaddled in his wife's arms in a light green blanket. Severus stood over her, his hands on her face planting kisses all over it. She giggled, she was exhausted, but happy. Severus looked down at their child._

" _Lux Tenebris Severus Snape." Severus said the words reverently as though they were a lifeline. Lily handed the sleeping bundle to him and he held the child as if he was the world, and to him, he was. The baby began to wake and he blinked open his green eyes staring up at his father. He had his mother's eyes._

 _~x~_

" _Lily, I don't know how much longer I can do this for. I'm immobilized with worry for you and our child every time you are not here. You should be home with me, there is no safer place than the Manor to be. I can protect you. You know this."_

" _Sev, I know you can, but we have to give our child a chance at a normal life. I refuse to live as a recluse with my son. Voldemort cannot know that you are his father, this is as much for your safety as it is for his. I will not have him growing up alone and I will not lose you!" She gestured to the small sleeping child in her arms._

" _You're right, he will not be alone. He will have us! That will be enough until we are rid of the Dark Lord. I could care less for my safety as long as you two remain within the Manor you are safe."_

" _Who knows how long it will be before he is gone, Severus! We've been over this, we can't subject him to a life of solitude because of some phony's prophecy."_

" _Fraud or not, the Dark Lord has targeted our son! We cannot risk him and I will not lose you!"_

 _Lily's shoulders fell and she stepped closer to Severus, handing the sleeping bundle to him._

" _Albus has given us every protection, we are as safe in Godric's Hollow as we would be here. Peter would never betray us."_

" _I don't trust him, love. He is as spineless as he is witless."_

" _You don't know him as I do. We'll be safe, Sev, I promise." She leaned up on her tip toes and planted a kiss on Severus' lips._

" _Still, I worry about you every moment you are gone and when I think about you with_ him! _I know it is for the best, but still, my blood boils. I see the way he looks at you, whether you want to admit it or not. And I can endure it, because I trust you. However, even with my Occlumency as strong as it ever has been, I am afraid I'm having a difficult time pushing all thoughts of you to the back of my mind. The worry is constant. Albus is becoming more and more intrusive in our lessons, I believe he may suspect, but does not wish to know the truth. And I can't even stomach the consequences if the Dark Lord found out." Severus paled at the thought, his face lit by the fire in the dark room._

" _I know this pains you, Sev and I've been searching for a solution. After a bit of research, I found a charm that can temporarily lock memories. The fact that you are an Occlumens will make this considerably easier. When we are not with you, you will not remember anything regarding our relationship and little Lux here. That is, you won't remember until I undo the charm when we come to see you. This charm will construct it's own little wall in the furthest recess of your mind. If anything were to happen to me it would break and you would remember our son so you could protect him. But Sev, that is simply a precaution, I will always be here to call you back to yourself. "_

 _Severus sat down heavily in his favorite chair by the fire, carefully adjusting his son as to not wake him. He ran his one free hand through his hair and down his face._

" _I can't imagine ever forgetting you, but if it is what will keep you both safe, so be it. I would never forgive myself if I was the cause of any harm to you."_

 _Lily leaned forward to relieve Severus of the sleeping child._

" _Let's put our little light in his room and then we can begin. I love you, Severus Snape. We will get through this together and when we do, we will live out our life as it should be. No phony marriage or names, just you, me and our sweet child. Remember? Always..."_

 _~x~_

Severus came to in his leather chair, he struggled as the memories fought for their rightful place in his mind, the headache not receding in the slightest. The pain became too much and he blacked out with one thought on his mind. "Potter is my child..."

XxXxXxXx

Sorry for the delay guys, I wanted to make sure this chapter was just right. Before it gets mentioned, there is a reason the charm did not break upon Lily's death and we'll get to that. ;-)

A shout out to Schattenjagd, who figured out Harry's name (Lux Tenebris) means 'Light in the Darkness'. Also, a shout out to both Reader 629 and kin2cat63, who both knew that Lux meant light. Great job, guys!

For anyone wondering, I took inspiration from Prince Manor on something I ran across the other day. If you would like to see what I have in mind Google: Ian McEwan's Enchanted Garden and it should be the first result you come across.

Reviews, questions, suggestions and comments always welcome and appreciated. See you all soon!

~Bria Snape


	7. Seeking Answers

Hi guys! Welcome back to Rude Awakenings: Refresh. I made a small edit to the last chapter, nothing big. I accidentally included more than I intended for the flashes of memories that Harry saw. Here is the updated portion, so what Harry actually saw: ' _A pretty red haired witch with emerald green eyes was up on tip-toe's trying to place a kiss...she was across from him at a table at a cafe smiling over her cup of tea, a blush gracing her features...she was bent over in the garden pulling weeds stubbornly...she was running into the mans arms tears running down her face as he limped into the garden...she was laying in bed, a kiss being placed on her forehead by the one that loved her...'_

 _Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and Co._

Chapter 7: Seeking Answers

Harry stood outside the Potion Master's office, rubbing the offended spot on his tailbone where he had hit the floor. The corridors, unlike the Defense training room, offered no such courtesy of charmed padded floors. It became apparent to Harry quite quickly, that Severus Snape would not be opening the door he had been pounding on just moments prior. Furious at the man, he turned on his heel and made his way to his rooms wincing as the spot on his back flared up in pain again. As if he wasn't sore enough from all of his other training that week.

So, Snape didn't want to tell him about what he saw, fine! He'd been solving his own mysteries for years now. One thing was apparent, Snape knew his mother much more so than he had ever let on, had possibly even dated her. Harry screwed up his face in a cringe at the thought. Passing through to his quarters he stripped off his outer robe and settled himself carefully in the nook by the window, looking out upon the Quidditch pitch thoughtfully.

Who did Snape think he was anyway? His mood was atrocious and he couldn't imagine any situation where what he just did would have been appropriate with a student. He had a pounding headache upon all the compiled aches from the week and he felt that if someone touched him the wrong way he would fall apart. Sighing he resigned himself to taking the day to rest tomorrow and hoping for the best.

The week had been tougher than he thought it would be. He had a feeling that this was not at all what Madame Pomfrey had intended when she told him not to over exert himself. He had been feeling the strain on his body build each day, but had been hesitant to speak up. Snape already thought he wasn't serious about learning, he didn't want to give the man anything else to throw in his face.

Groaning at the effort it took to stand, Harry made his way to the enchanted door to see if it had updated with a new assignment as it always did. For once it was blank under _Daily Task Goals._ Snape had been completely out of sorts at the end of the lesson. Harry committed himself to complete the next three chapters in his Occlumency text that night anyway, so he could have all of tomorrow to recover. He did not intend to incur Snape's wrath when the new week started and he demanded an assignment he never gave.

He still had Defense lessons that afternoon and at this rate, he didn't know how he was going to get through it. He decided to take another long soak in the bath, it was all he had available to him unless he intended to pay a visit to the Hospital Wing, which he was determined to avoid at all costs.

XxXxXxXx

Severus Snape crossed the threshold to Prince Manor for the first time in nearly fifteen years. He had no desire to return to this place once he had taken up his position as Potions Master at Hogwarts. Too many bad memories with his grandparents were held here. Well, that's what he had thought, now he knew it had to do with the memory block, for he had many good memories here too. He had long gotten over the ghosts of his past thanks to his lovely Lily.

Holding his wand out high in front of him, the light reflected off the gold framed mirror over the fireplace. He ignored the house elf that fell at his feet as he entered and strode forward with purpose. He had one thought on his mind, answers, he needed answers and he now knew where he would get them.

He ascended the rich stone stairway, his foot steps echoing in the vast space that had been empty for so many years. As he reached the top he turned swiftly to the left heading to the West Wing. The West Wing… which he now knew, is where he had lived with Lily, before his memories were sealed.

His footsteps were muffled by the runner that ran the length of the cold, dark hallway. The drapes had not been opened for years and were it not for the one elf he kept on staff, they surely would have been full of doxies.

His footsteps slowed as he reached the end of the hall, the dark wood door that was the entrance to their room loomed before him. He reached out a trembling hand, running it down the surface of the wood until it stopped at the handle. Twisting it quickly, he pushed it open. He hesitated to enter. His head was still swimming from the influx of memories, he needed confirmation though. Needed proof that everything he saw was true.

Taking a deep breath and steeling himself he entered the room. He thought he was prepared, but he stumbled backwards at what he saw before him. It was so…so Lily. It was all silvers and grays and whites. With flecks of color interspersed throughout the room. The headboard was a gray Chesterfield, the comforter a plush white feather down. A soft gray blanket with silver threads weaving through lay at the foot of the bed. The canopy hangings all white and sheer silver. His eyes flitted to the frame above the bed, pressed behind the glass were dried flowers from the gardens Lily had worked so hard to restore. A birch wood vanity with a silver framed mirror sat to the right of the bed, Lily's brushes and hair pieces still upon it.

Walking over to the vanity, Severus sat down on the gray Chesterfield bench. Slowly reaching out he picked up a delicate looking object, a white oxeye daisy on a silver clip, the same as were in her hair on their wedding day. Severus remembered gifting this to her on their first anniversary. He had spelled it with an Everfresh Charm and she had favored it in her hair often.

As he set the clip back down, he saw something glint out of the corner of his eye. He froze. Lily's wedding ring… Moving so slowly, as though if he touched it, it would break, he picked up the ring. It looked as if she could have just removed it for a cleaning. It had a thin black gold band with a large emerald set in the middle, smaller emeralds circling the larger. And, yet still, two more small emeralds to either side of the circle of emeralds. He closed his had tightly around it as though if he squeezed hard enough, Lily would materialize beside him.

He shivered even through the burst of warmth that spiked through him as he clutched the ring to his heart. She had always left it with Severus when she was away living her dual life. Had him promise to keep it safe for her until her return to which he had responded every time, 'Always.' Finding the little black ring box in which he had purchased it, he slipped it inside and put it in his pocket. He would continue to keep it safe.

Turning he made to exit the room, he didn't know how much more he could withstand. As he turned on his heel a picture on the fireplace mantle caught his attention. It was Lily, laying on her side on a leaf strewn ground in Autumn, her head propped up by her hand. Baby Harry sat next to her, a small pile of leaves in front of him and Severus was sat on yet the other side of the child. Lily was gazing at Severus the smile clear in her eyes as she laughed at baby Harry throwing leaves in Severus' face. The Potions Master had a scowl on his face, but the smile was evident in the creases of his eyes. This was the last picture they had taken as a family. He tucked this too into a pocket in his robes.

Turning to enter the next room, Potter's room, he steeled himself. Well, he wasn't really Potter now, was he? Never was. He was Lux, but that was neither here nor there. The boy was Harry Potter to the rest of the world and that wasn't likely to change any time soon. Couldn't if he were to keep the boy safe.

He turned the handle, this time not hesitating to step into the room. The walls were painted a deep blue, the hangings around his crib silver. Looking up at the ceiling Severus could see traces of the constellations that Lily had painted on the ceiling all those years ago. A small mobile of golden snitches and silver broomsticks hung over the crib.

How, how had this happened? The spell should have broken years ago. Severus drew back the curtains with his wand and made to look out the window over the now wild garden that even the elves hadn't been able to keep up with. The hedges were neatly trimmed, but the flowers contained within were such a mess, that you'd sooner be able traverse the Forbidden Forest, than the brambles that lay below.

Severus moved to sit in the white rocking chair beside the window. What was he to do now? It was clear that the Potter ch… that Harry was his son, but what was he to do about it? The child clearly hated him and it was no wonder with the way he'd been treated.

As for Severus, he knew he was his son, but he still didn't know the boy. Not really. He had never even taken the time to try. He pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. With these new memories he was no longer able to gather the same ire that hit him when he thought about the boy. Perhaps the primal disdain he felt for the boy was a side effect of the charm that had been placed on him. Lily wouldn't have done such a thing though. So who?

Severus closed his eyes and retreated into his mind searching for anything that might seem out of place. Something he didn't recognize before. He swam past all the new memories that now came to the forefront of his mind. Desperate to make it back to that crumbling wall and obliterate it completely.

He stopped in the furthest recesses of his mind. There it was. Broken and barely standing, but there it was. He gathered the new memories around him and shot forward at the wall with all he could muster. Once…Twice…and on the third time he broke through. A memory floated lazily to the surface and he dove towards it.

 _He was in Dumbledore's office, Albus was sat calmly behind his desk._

" _Where is my son, Albus?! Where have you hidden him?" Severus was frantic, more frantic than he had ever been in his life. The love of his life had just died and his son needed him, but he was no where to be found._

" _Son, Severus? I'm afraid I have no idea what you mean."_

" _Don't play coy with me, Albus! You know exactly of which I speak. Lux, I mean 'Harry' is my son. You've suspected for months don't play your senile old man act with me. I won't have it! Now where is he?! You told me to trust you, that the prophecy would serve only as a distraction to the Dark Lord and where has that trust gotten me?" Severus was leaning across the desk practically spitting in the old man's face, he became more and more infuriated as the man remained calm._

" _Ah, yes. You see, I was afraid we may hit this little snag. I was rather desperate to avoid it, but it seems that it will not be possible." Quicker than Severus was able to comprehend, Albus' wand was in his hand, poking Severus in the temple. Distraught as he was, Severus barely heard the man's next words._

" _I think it best, for the safety of all parties involved, if we just forget this little detail. Now let's see, you are master enough at Occlumency that you would notice being obliviated. So what say we seal up that wall Lily was so clever to create. We have not seen the last of Lord Voldemort. Protect him you shall, from a distance. It is best." There was a brief fleck of sadness that entered the old man's eye as he sealed the wall before Severus could raise a hand._

That conniving, lunatic of an old man. How dare he! Albus had a terrible habit of overstepping boundaries, but this time he had more than overstepped. He had obliterated the boundary line. Oh, Albus would get a piece of his mind and he would be damned if the old coot tried to talk his way out of this one. Not even bothering to make his way out of the house he apparated straight to the gates of Hogwarts. He strode swiftly through the gates, robes flaring menacingly behind him. It was a very good thing school was not in session or he may have petrified students with a single glare.

XxXxXxXx

When Harry finally got out of the bath he only had a half hour until his next lesson. He got dressed and ladled himself a bowl of chicken and rice soup, dipping the roll in as he ate quickly in the window seat that was quickly becoming his favorite spot. As the table popped out of existence, Harry checked the time and made for the door, but the schedule caught his eye. Sometime while he was in the bath, it had changed, he must not have heard the bell over the gushing faucets. His defense lesson had been canceled and it had been replaced with instruction for self-study.

That was so...not Snape. Snape was clearly upset about something, but what? It was obvious from what he had seen that his mother and Snape had been friends. Was it possible that he was that upset at having those memories thrust to the forefront of his mind. Harry was having a hard time reconciling the dark, foreboding man with a man that cared about someone.

Harry ran a hand back through his long hair. It was all just so frustrating, why couldn't his summers be normal? Wasn't it enough that his school year was always interrupted by some machination of Voldemort? For once it would be great if all he had to worry about was normal teenage drama. He grabbed the Defense Book Hermione had given him for his birthday from the shelf above his desk. Determined to get some fresh air he headed outside to study under the big beech tree beside the Black Lake.

XxXxXxXx

Severus strode straight through the gates of Hogwarts on a war path. Intent to make that old man pay for what he had done. He was halfway up the path when a snowy white owl flying down from the owlry caught his eye. He watched the familiar as it flew down to it's master and gracefully land on his shoulder, nipping at the boys ear.

He stopped, making his way off the path and peering out to survey the dark-haired boy below. What was he supposed to do? The boy hated him and who could blame him. He had taken out his frustration with the dreams, which he now knew where actually memories, on the boy in his last Occlumency lesson. It was of course completely contradictory to everything he had been trying to teach the child.

He took a deep breath, really, going to Albus was not the best course of action right now. He had been about to burst in to his office like some undisciplined Gryffindor. As he stared at the boy, that he now knew was his son, he felt a fierce flame of protectiveness blaze to life inside of him. He could best protect his son by keeping this to himself. Albus could not know what he knew. He could not risk having the meddling old fool in his business.

Of course that meant he could not tell Harry yet either, not until he had more of a handle on his Occlumency. If Albus ever suspected, he would not hesitate to push into Harry's mind and Harry was at no level to recognize an obliviation. Turning back up to the castle, Severus determined that the boy would learn an acceptable degree of Occlumency by the end of the month, even if it meant he had to alter his teaching style. He curled his lip slightly at that, Severs was never the type of man who liked to admit when he had been wrong, but thus far this summer, he had failed the boy. He felt sick enough having canceled a lesson. He had never canceled a lesson in all his years as a teacher it went against everything he was.

XxXxXxXx

"Harry, my boy! Please come in, have a seat. Lemon drop?" Dumbledore proffered the silver tin to Harry which he waved away with one hand.

"No thank you, Professor." Harry had woken up, quite irritably, to the chime of an update to his calendar stating he was to meet Albus in his office at 9am. As he had dragged his aching body out of bed, he cursed to himself, apparently he would not begetting the lie in he had been planning. He felt miserable, completely exhausted and he was doing his best to keep it off of his face.

"Very well." Dumbledore sighed, he would never understand why no one ever accepted the muggle confection. "Now, you must be wondering why I wanted to see you this morning." He peered at Harry over his half moon glasses expecting an answer, even though it ought to be a redundant question.

"Yes, sir." Harry replied obediently, mentally rolling his eyes at Dumbledore's antics. He had to be in control of everything.

"I have a tentative plan set for your visit to Diagon Alley, I just have one more member of the Order that I need to speak with." Dumbledore looked quite pleased with himself, as though he had done Harry a great favor and in a way, the boy relented, he had. Harry brightened, straightening slightly in his chair, eager to see his friends again.

"I have arranged next Sunday for you to visit with your little friends, you will be departing from my office with two Order members. You will be allowed only three hours in Diagon Alley, so I suggest you make the most of your time. I expect you to stay close to the Order members at all time, no wandering off. Understood?" The wizened wizard peered seriously at the young wizard in front of him.

"I understand. Thank you, sir." Harry conceded, the man did deserve thanks, even if he wasn't on the best of terms with him at the time.

"Very well. You are dismissed." He smiled kindly at Harry. Harry stood swiftly making for the door when Dumbledore's voice stopped him short.

"Ah. Harry." Harry turned around tentatively raising an eyebrow in question. "Perhaps a haircut wouldn't be amiss while you are out."

Harry nodded his understanding and hurried down the spiral staircase anxious to get back to his rooms. Perhaps he could squeeze in a couple more hours sleep yet. In his hurry he narrowly avoided crashing into his Transfiguration's Professor. He maneuvered around her at the last second, as she held a hand to her heart with a gasp, startled.

"Sorry, Professor McGonagall." Harry exclaimed helping to steady the stern witch.

"And you are..." She paused, taking in the appearance of the wizard in front of her. Harry saw it when the flash or recognition entered her eye. He didn't look that different. Did he? "What on earth are you doing here, Mr. Potter?"

"You mean you don't know?" Harry asked before he could stop himself. He was sure Dumbledore would have told the Deputy Headmistress he was here.

"I assure you I have absolutely no idea, Mr. Potter. I was just on my way to see Albus to discuss the upcoming year." She surveyed the boy in front of her, if she didn't know better she would think he was a Snape and not a Potter at all. The difference from last year was remarkable and she wrinkled her eyebrows in thought.

"I've had to take up summer Occlumency and Defense lessons with Professor Snape. I've been given a room in the dungeons." Harry sighed, purposely not elaborating on the reason he arrived at Hogwarts to begin with. If she didn't know, he certainly wasn't going to be the one to enlighten her. Pity was the last thing he wanted. He just wanted to keep moving forward and all the studying was sure helping him not to think on things past.

"Ah, I see. Well I'm sure Albus will fill me in. On your way, Mr. Potter." She smiled kindly at him, she had always had a soft spot for the boy.

"Bye Professor!" Harry waved and turned on his his heel his robes billowing behind as he made for the stairs. Professor McGonagall gave the password to the stone gargoyle and thought to herself, 'Perhaps Harry has been spending a bit _too_ much time with Severus, I'll have to be sure to invite him for biscuits soon.'

XxXxXxXx

Reviews, questions, suggestions and comments always welcome and appreciated. See you all soon!

~Bria Snape


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